Grieving and Healing from the passing of someone you Dearly LOVE…
Whenever a friend would tell me their parent(s) passed away I would say something like, “I’m so sorry to hear that. I still have both of my parents so I have no idea what that feels like. I know there is nothing I can do that will prepare me for when I no longer have them and it terrifies me to think about it.” And then id turn it back to them letting them know I’m here for them even if just to listen because I don’t know what to say that could possibly help.
Now I’m on that other side of the fence that I never wanted to be on. It’s been 8 days since the passing of my father on oct 13th 2017. 3 days since my fathers funeral.
I feel disoriented, lost, like the universe is re arranging everything, light headed sometimes, constant pressure on my chest and knots in my tummy that won’t go away. I will never be the same. But never being the same is always true. This change of never being the same again is exponentially greater than other constant changes. A friend shared some advice with me that I believe I will start to share with friends who lose a parent or anyone really close to them. If you can allow feeling his or her soul closer to you rather than his or her body at this time it may help. Yes, I think that does help. We identify visually with our loved ones their temporary bodies that they occupy because it’s all we’ve ever known them to occupy. When they shed their very limited fleshly body they become truly free in their Light Form. Is there anything more liberating than that?
I’m happy for my dad that he is free now. Truly free. Even if you occupy a healthy body its still very limiting. My dad occupied a body that required an oxygen feed 24/7. His lungs were shot. His body was limiting him more than the average body but his spirit was so strong he still played poker, he still went on a cruise, he still went to Las Vegas, still got on an airplane, still lived life and wanted to do things despite struggling to breath.
I’m happy for my dad but sad for me because I’m here still in my temporary limited fleshly body missing my dad. I can’t wait to shed my body so I can see my dad again but at the same time I want to enjoy life in my temporary body and live the best life I can because my dad wants that.
I want the pressure in my chest to go away and the knots in my tummy to loosen. I want to feel my dads soul closer to me rather than his body.
If this helps you grieve the passing of someone close to you or if you have friends who you think this might help please feel free to share this around.
I love you friends and family and I love your friends and family, too.
Tom
p.s. ALWAYS leave on a positive note NO MATTER WHAT WAS SAID BEFORE because you never know when someone is going to pass even if they seem completely healthy and safe. Always spend the time you want to spend with people you love. The last thing I said to my dad, just four and a half hours before he passed away and totally coherent and not knowing this would be the last, “… I’ll see you again shortly ok?” to which he nodded yes and gave me a quick wave. I literally spent more time with my parents than at my home for years. When my dad was in the hospital for the last time I was up there visiting up 2 or 3 times every day for 12 days. I made sure we ended each visit on a good note for the last number of YEARS each and every time and still do with my mom. Please make sure you are doing something similar, ok?