Confused, sad, shocked, and what now?

Unexpected major TWIST to my dance journey that has me reeling and figuring out what next.

Imagine pouring your heart and soul into a dance academy for two years straight. Day in, day out, you show up with unwavering loyalty and support. You trust the process, the teachers, their skill, their commitment. Never once do you question or argue. You’re always holding space for their vision.

Then, the unthinkable happens. The teachers host their first-ever dance social, a celebration of student anniversaries. One year, two years, even seven years – everyone’s milestones are being honored. You’re thrilled to be celebrating your own two-year mark. The music pulses, you dance with abandon, lost in the joy of the moment. This is one of the most fun socials I have ever attended.

And then, in an instant, everything shatters. Just before the recognition ceremony, one of my teachers hands me a bag with a plaque, a t-shirt, offers kind words and a hug. It’s a sweet gesture. The ceremony begins, names are called, students take the stage, but not me. I’m the only one excluded, left sitting alone on a sofa as strangers glance at me in confusion. Why wasn’t I called up? Why am I being left out?

The group photo is taken, and still, I’m excluded. I’m shunned with absolute confusion and bewilderment. The recognition ceremony has concluded. Two minutes into the next song, I get up, leave my recognition bag behind, and walk out. The teachers can find it later, a reminder of the one student they so callously disregarded.

The next day, radio silence. No call, no text, no acknowledgment of the hurt they’ve caused. I’m left reeling, trying to make sense of this sudden, inexplicable betrayal. There has never been an argument, a problem, or a moment of rudeness of any kind between myself and the teachers in the two years I had been paying for their largest ticket item each and every month consistently. I thought there was always a mutual respect. For a moment as I was sitting there experiencing this extreme exclusion I was wondering if I was somehow just an oversite? I don’t think so. It had to have been on purpose. I was there in clear site, one of the teachers handed me my bag just before the ceremony began, and strangers in the audience were baffled by my exclusion. The teachers had to have excluded me on purpose. And for what reason?

But here’s the thing – recognition has never been my motivator. I never expect such things in exchange for my support. What cuts deep is the sense of being shunned, of a “fuck you” from teachers I respected and trusted. The teachers gave me so much in two years, helped me grow in ways I never thought possible. That’s what makes this so heartbreaking.

Gratitude and Reflection:
I received unimagined value from the teachers over these past two years. They are highly skilled dancers and teachers. I would not be where I am in my dance journey today if not for these amazing teachers and nothing could ever take that away. That’s what makes this so sad for me, to be shunned in this way by two teachers I really looked up to and received so much value from. At the same time, it’s also an already known lesson in how not to treat people. It’s also a stark reminder that anybody you trust can turn on a dime without provocation and leave you in the dark without rhyme or reason. In life you have to be willing to let go of expectation and flow because people you trust will disappoint you in ways you don’t see coming. I also believe in forgiveness.

So what’s next?

I’m cancelling my membership and exploring other studios. I’m definitely diving deeper into Brazilion Zouk dancing. I may spend more time on my music. I was going to this dance studio 4 days a week as much as 4 hours per day. This was a huge regular time commitment I got use to for two straight years. So, now I have to get un use to it and move on in my life. It almost feels like breaking up with a girlfriend. Weird.

Tom
https://linktr.ee/metalpalace

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