What begins as a moment of immaturity can evolve into a stepping stone toward greater self-awareness and lasting change. Sometimes, a mistake or error in judgment serves as the ultimate catalyst for profound personal growth. But the question of meaningfulness: is this change one of evolution or devolution? Change is an inevitability, but the true measure lies in whether it refines or diminishes our humanity.

When assessing mistakes, I’ve come to realize that intention holds weight. The mistake, or error in judgement; was this intentionally nefarious or unintentionally hurtful to another human you really love? When someone hurts me I always consider intention because where someones heart is has deep meaning. The hurt inflicted by those we love resonates deeply, and understanding where their heart stood at the time sheds light on their actions. Yet, there exists a spectrum of errors, ranging from those that may heal with time to others that leave scars too deep to fully forgive.

Certain errors in judgement can be so soul shaking it changes your physical DNA structure forever, leaving an indelible mark on our being. This speaks to the intricate bond between our physical and non physical selves, and the necessity of nurturing both physical and non physical for holistic well-being. When you change forever in this way at your DNA it solidifies that this particular error in judgement could never be repeated again. THAT PART OF YOU HAS DIED BY THE PAIN that was inflicted. That moment of bad judgement can never be resurrected, instead it stays in the past only to be reflected upon as a lesson etched into our soul serving as a guide for a more evolved present and future. It makes a person a better human and a better lover.

In this way, our mistakes, though painful, can be the crucible in which we are refined. They challenge us to grow, to love more wisely, and to become better versions of ourselves for ourselves and for our lover. And it is in this evolution, this rise from the ashes of our former selves, that we find the grace to forgive, to be forgiven, to heal, and to love and be loved again, deeper and more fully than before.

Read my next blog post I spun off from the one you just read:
A Commitment to Love and Growth Instead of Fear and Silence

-Tom