The most precious moments in the cycles of life.

You will not want to live in fear of how bills are going to be paid or if you can’t get permission from a gate keeper at your job who may deny you.

When you NEED to be where you need to be you will be so glad you learned to become free financially from ALL your expenses.

This past week I needed to be with my family for my dad who passed away. No boss to check in with. No worry about bills or how I’d be covered financially. I was free to put my energy where it needed to be and all my expenses were covered anyway.

This wasn’t given to me. I had to earn it in the midst of a dark period of struggle in my life years ago.

I’m grateful I’m of the minority of our population who is a starter and finisher. It’s worth it for these most precious moments when we truly need that wonderful passive and residual income to de-couple our time from our income so we can be where we need to be when we need to be without permission from anyone but ourselves.

It took me a while to figure it out. No one would join me when I first started. You can figure it out too with our endless help if you’ll take it.

The simplified formula for setting yourself free financially is 1. Make a decision 2. tell the world 3. Figure it out by falling head over heals in love with learning and applying what you learn along the way a constant course of correction and re correction that never stops.

Don’t fail to start because you don’t know how. Do start so it can be revealed to you how.

Don’t quit after you’ve started because you made a mistake. Do make mistakes and allow them to reveal the path to the finish line.

See your mistakes along the path of learning for what they are, that is, your road map to being a finisher rather than a quitter.

Getting started and making mistakes QUICKLY is your key ingredient to setting yourself free financially so you can LIVE free of worry about how bills and other expenses will be paid for.

My dad was very proud of me, and still is from Heaven now, that his son started and saw it through without quitting. I don’t know if he thought I’d see this through when I first started and then again when I wasn’t making any money in the beginning. He saw me stick it out and create my own success and that honestly is one HUGE motivating reason for me that I wanted to see this through. I wanted to make my dad proud of me. He already was, but still, this was really important to me that he sees me be well financially too because residual bills are a fact of life that never goes away as long as we are living so I wanted residual and passive income to over power my residual bills.

My dad saw, just as we all see, most people do not start or see things through and always have an excuse to make it easier to live with themselves for being a non starter and a quitter.

That life style of quitting is not worth it because the real damage comes as a person chips away at their individuality and self esteem.

It’s impossible to create yourself according to your own individual authenticity if you live the life style of a quitter.

It’s nothing to beat yourself up over if that’s your past. If it is your past just draw a line in the sand TODAY and tell yourself along with the rest of the world you’re jumping over that line with BOTH FEET and you’re going to start living now as your own individual free thinking authentic self.

Then watch how the world around you benefits from your light.

No more of this quitting or procrastination non sense.

To my friends who have been faithful with what you’ve been given, remember you were once a quitter too til you decided not to be a quitter anymore. Love everyone, but, prioritize your home business time and energy for people who are ready to take action now because action is the only place where a positive impact can be created.

I love you all,

Tom

p.s. If you’re interested in looking at what I’m doing just ask and I’ll show and support whatever you wanna do this or something else. My dad loved that about me and how I helped other people get healthy financially and even physically. I always supported everyone. My dad would get so pissed at telemarketers who pitched the way they did and would keep going even after he said he wasn’t interested. He loves the fact I just love and support everyone and that I build a team of people who love and support, too. How I build and how I help others build is one of many ways I love to honor the life of my Dad. Please feel free to share this on your timelines maybe you’ve got some friends and family who’d love the messaging of this post.

Grieving and Healing from the passing of someone you Dearly LOVE…

Whenever a friend would tell me their parent(s) passed away I would say something like, “I’m so sorry to hear that. I still have both of my parents so I have no idea what that feels like. I know there is nothing I can do that will prepare me for when I no longer have them and it terrifies me to think about it.” And then id turn it back to them letting them know I’m here for them even if just to listen because I don’t know what to say that could possibly help.

Now I’m on that other side of the fence that I never wanted to be on. It’s been 8 days since the passing of my father on oct 13th 2017. 3 days since my fathers funeral.

I feel disoriented, lost, like the universe is re arranging everything, light headed sometimes, constant pressure on my chest and knots in my tummy that won’t go away. I will never be the same. But never being the same is always true. This change of never being the same again is exponentially greater than other constant changes. A friend shared some advice with me that I believe I will start to share with friends who lose a parent or anyone really close to them. If you can allow feeling his or her soul closer to you rather than his or her body at this time it may help. Yes, I think that does help. We identify visually with our loved ones their temporary bodies that they occupy because it’s all we’ve ever known them to occupy. When they shed their very limited fleshly body they become truly free in their Light Form. Is there anything more liberating than that?

I’m happy for my dad that he is free now. Truly free. Even if you occupy a healthy body its still very limiting. My dad occupied a body that required an oxygen feed 24/7. His lungs were shot. His body was limiting him more than the average body but his spirit was so strong he still played poker, he still went on a cruise, he still went to Las Vegas, still got on an airplane, still lived life and wanted to do things despite struggling to breath.

I’m happy for my dad but sad for me because I’m here still in my temporary limited fleshly body missing my dad. I can’t wait to shed my body so I can see my dad again but at the same time I want to enjoy life in my temporary body and live the best life I can because my dad wants that.

I want the pressure in my chest to go away and the knots in my tummy to loosen. I want to feel my dads soul closer to me rather than his body.

If this helps you grieve the passing of someone close to you or if you have friends who you think this might help please feel free to share this around.

I love you friends and family and I love your friends and family, too.

Tom

p.s. ALWAYS leave on a positive note NO MATTER WHAT WAS SAID BEFORE because you never know when someone is going to pass even if they seem completely healthy and safe. Always spend the time you want to spend with people you love. The last thing I said to my dad, just four and a half hours before he passed away and totally coherent and not knowing this would be the last, “… I’ll see you again shortly ok?” to which he nodded yes and gave me a quick wave. I literally spent more time with my parents than at my home for years. When my dad was in the hospital for the last time I was up there visiting up 2 or 3 times every day for 12 days. I made sure we ended each visit on a good note for the last number of YEARS each and every time and still do with my mom. Please make sure you are doing something similar, ok?

The uncontrollable crying has become less frequent Dad, but you’re still heavy on my mind, pressure still on my chest, knots still in my tummy, and a huge void still in my heart.

Mom and I went to the funeral parlor to settle things with them. They are so unbelievably wonderful, helpful, personal, genuine. We really love them and they love us. Kris and her husband wish they could have known you. They missed out on a lot of laughter and great conversations. You were a mentor and teacher to many. The word “mentor” I do not say lightly. Mentor has a sacred meaning to it much more so than a teacher. Your intellect, wisdom, encyclopedic knowledge of anything you were really interested in in, your fast humor, stories, and puns, your creative sides, dad you had a lot of value that you added to peoples lives.

Jason came out to the funeral parlor after we basically had everything settled to say bye for now to you and see the body you temporarily occupied for 74 years. Its the visual representation of you that we have known and identify with that we miss along with everything else about you dad.

I had a few crying moments throughout the couple hours we were there. I’ll tell you about my biggest uncontrollable cry I had yesterday when we were settling things at the funeral parlor…

I wrote the personal check for your final expense. I wrote slowly and cried the entire time. Never have I taken so much time to write a check before and I hardly ever write checks anymore. I kept the carbon copy. I pressed hard to make sure I got a good carbon copy and I did. I even put a heart in the memo area along with a short description of the purpose of that particular check.

But here is the part of the check writing process where I broke down and cried the most…

I told them that we have a copy of the check that you wrote dad, for the adoption fee when you and mom adopted me when I was just a newborn baby and you’ve told me many years ago that it was the best check you ever wrote before in your life. And now here I was writing the final expense check for you dad. Oh wow I cried. The funeral directors were touched at the story! They believed you were right dad when you said that was the best check you ever wrote in your life for my adoption fees. Back in those days they use to send the checks back to you. They stopped doing that years ago now you can get images of sent checks. Today I won’t get the check back in the mail but I have that carbon copy and we still have the original check you wrote 40 years ago for my adoption fee. How amazing is that dad?

When we went to look at your old body you temporarily occupied one last time I recited the check writing story one more time and of course while looking at your old body that I visually identify with you I had one more uncontrollable cry before taking off with mom to the veterans office here in kenosha to get started on benefits for mom. The four of us in our bodies were together one last time dad. Three of us still occupying our temporary bodies, you’ve already vacated your body dad. While the four of us were there I quickly reflected on many other times the four of us were together such as long car rides to st. louis, various vacations, time spent at home playing games like aggravation, trips to uncle bobs and aunt claudias while you played cards and the rest of us kids ran wild in the basement, holidays, so much time the four of us have spent together over the years dad. I’m really happy about that. My final last words I spoke out loud to you, dad, to the body you once occupied for seventy four years, and with you listening to me from where you are now, was something like.. See you again shortly dad, ok? Thank you for adopting me. I really lucked out because I did not get to choose you. I got to write your final expense check 40 years after you wrote the check for my adoption fees. I love you. I really miss you badly dad. I probably said more I was really going on and on. The final last thing I said after all of that was the same thing I said to you while I last saw you one week ago today, “I’ll see you again shortly dad ok?” Then I walked out with mom to take her to the veterans office here in Kenosha to figuring out benefits for mom.

During our time at the funeral parlor we collected a beautiful vase and a couple of flower arrangements in baskets. Most importantly we collected your medals and ribbons from your distinguished career in the Navy. OH yes we have your USN tie clip too. Ohhhhh yes the sympathy cards, registry book, and some other things like that too. I really didn’t want anything else like the different flower arrangements and stuff like that. I don’t feel like I can stomach forming these emotional attachments to “stuff” I just want to cling to the memories and how I will move onward from here dad. The rest of the flowers will go to nursing homes which we are told are very much loved by the old folks. That’s really awesome! That’s where they should go then. The funeral directors husband is going to put some of the flowers over his grandpas grave. The funeral director was surprised at that! I thought that was pretty cool they are finding meaningful uses for these things that we don’t really need. Dad I know the family that owns and operates Bruchs funeral home does incredible word to help each and ever family and personalizes and handles so much for each of them… I’d be lying if I didn’t say I really believe they took on a particular heart felt interest in our family dad. Mom said she saw Kris, the funeral director, crying at one point. It could have been over something else I suppose. Who knows. Just the over all affection in addition to attention makes me belief shes great with every family she works with and helps, but ours had a particular special sense of intrinsic duty for her and her family to help and do for our family. I could be wrong but that’s what I think. Even after the expense is settled she’s still going to work with us when certain things come in the mail, with the death certificate which we are still waiting for, and other things. That’s amazing she is there for us that far out on a limb. Dad it feels like there really isnt all that much more to do to get everything settled. Its mostly just moms benefits. Right now we are waiting on the doctor to sign your death certificate so we can get all your accounts settled with mom and her benefits going. Apparently the doctor we are waiting on is the Hospitalist which as you know from your final hospital stay is a very busy doctor. Kris was hoping to have that signature yesterday along with the medical examiners report. So hopefully today then so we can move on these final things. I’m scared but also looking forward to getting past all this so we can begin figuring life out without you as we’ve always known you dad. How to figure everything out with your new status as Angel. My dad is literally an angel now. That’s pretty cool even though I’m still so sad and missing you so incredibly.

Last night was the poker league the day after your funeral. After Jason got things set up he was great. I didn’t play I just wanted to visit and be in the environment of it all. Something you really enjoyed dad was these poker league nights Big Dog Poker. The league you started with Jason. Now he’s figuring it out on his own. Lou Anne came with us. Michelle went with Aunt Claudia and having never played Texas hold ’em before in her life and not even knowing basic poker hands she almost made it to final table. Not bad Michelle! You use to call her Mikey I remember! You called Melissa, “Mel” and Michelle “Mikey” and it always made them laugh. Damn I miss that! Those little things. The big things. I miss everything. But today is a new day and tomorrow is always coming no matter what but in different unpredictable and sometimes very mysterious forms from what we are use to of yesterday. Dad I remember some of the talk about you at poker last night. One of your players said your favorite pocket had was a jack and ten because you seemed to get lucky with that hand. Others talked about and marveled in amazing at how you could count cards in your head and know exactly what everyone had in their hand that way and know exactly what to do based on statistical odds. I would say the proof if that is “in the pudding” because you won more than anyone in the league pretty consistently. Your brother, my uncle bob, was a brilliant mental card counter too. Anytime anyone went against you two they would get their clock cleaned and in a frustrating way, for them!!! LoL because they knew you what was in their hand, what was left in the deck, just based on your ability to count cards and remember it all in your head as each hand progressed and your opponents could not do that!!!! Yeah that frustrated them but they kept coming back for more probably because their fascination in your ability to do that over powered their frustration about it. Pretty cool dad. Pretty cool.

Dad I’m getting better. I’ll know for sure though after everything here is settled which I think will be soon. Otherwise I don’t know how I’m doing. I just know I think for now I am getting better.

It will never go away dad I’m always going to miss you and crave to see you again.

Like you said on your final days in the hospital, “It’s sink or swim.”

On facebook the other day I posted in a Heart themed frame box that facebook makes, “Every Birthday is 1 step closer to Heaven without discounting our short time on Earth – me
Share.”

It got some cool heart felt comments, some likes, loves, shares. I’ve been sharing a lot of stuff like that and typing up big ole self expression storms like this with literally thousands of comments, likes, loves, a really good number shares and different engagements and interactions. I think as people learn more about you dad and the bond you and I have it’s helping people. How cool is that dad? So I’m going to keep doing this as I need to for my own therapy and just be completely open, forthright, even vulnerable about it all.

I even made a humors post about Boobs yesterday..LoL See dad I’m making progress. Everyone knows about my fascination with boobs I hope that never stops. I don’t think it will.

I’ll see you again shortly dad ok?

-Tom

P.s. The cubs got knocked out of the play offs yesterday in a big ole upset in their own home town. 11-1 was the final score. So the world series this year in 2017 will be between the LA Dodgers for the national league and either the Houston Astros or the New York Yankees for the American league. Let’s see how your life time favorite team does next year, the St. Louis Cardinals. I’ll be rooting for them for life dad right along with you. I probably still won’t really watch much or follow it but anytime I happen to see an inning or catch a headline about the cardinals ill sure be thinking of you mostly dad, and rooting for them to win right along with you as I always have. Oh yeah, the sport I have the least amount of interest in, football… Aaron Rodgers is out for the season with a broken collar bone I heard. I know you are a life long football fan, baseball, and basketball. You love the green bay packers. So What does this mean for them to lose their star player for the year? Can’t be good, I guess? Jason would know I’m sure. You have encyclopedic knowledge of these sports. Amazes me. You amaze me dad every day.

The morning after my dads viewing and full military honors..

Dad, oh wow you were LOVING what happened yesterday. You were eating it up with a big grin on your spiritual face. I didnt know how many would show. I believe you had more people at your funeral than grams did. I don’t remember ever seeing so many people show up for something like this anywhere else, ever. The viewing room was so full it overflowed into another room. So much respect, support, and LOVE from so many people. This has to be a tell tale sign of your influence dad, and how you made people feel. I’ve said this before, dad, we don’t get to choose our parents. I really lucked out with you and mom. Of all those peoples lives you’ve positively impacted I get the distinguishing relationship of a father and son relationship with you. How did that happen? I got really very super lucky Dad. Thank you for adopting me. Thank you thank you thank you for adopting me. And dad, even if just a few showed or if it was just us in immediate family, I still feel the same about our relationship. This was just a really nice bonus that so many people came to be there with us. Oh and get this.. Jason was given this really nice poker box with poker chips in it signed by each of the poker players. So many of them! The put a lot of thought and care into the design of the whole box and everything in it and presented it to jason. Oh my god it was so nice.

Dad you wanted full military honors and to be in your uniform one last time. We made it happen dad. We really did! And guess what? When the order came in for you to have full military honors, the active duty navy chief who is in charge of the entire state of Wisconsin saw your distinguished Navy career and said, “Ill take this one”. He traveled a long distance to conduct your full military honors. There were active duty sailors sent from Great Lakes Navy Base to fold your flag. And locally here in Kenosha there is a Vietnam War retired veterans group that came in to participate in the full military honors because you too are a retired Vietnam War Veteran. None of them knew you when you were living in your earthly body. They saluted their Senior Chief, that’s you dad. All of your Medals and Ribbons were on display. A couple people asked what each medal was for and I’m sorry to say I did not know. I remember asking you MANY years ago and I just don’t remember what your answers were.

One thing I WISH I had thought of was to ask the funeral director to let me do a eulogy for you. She did a GREAT job with your eulogy dad. As she was talking on her podium it just hit me that I would have loved to have been speaking about you Dad. I’m not going to beat myself up over it. It’s just something I wish I had done for you. But you know what? Next best thing will be to write these blogs to tell everyone about you, my Dad. I know you will never agree with me, and others you’ve positively affected, because you are so damn humble, but we think the whole world should know about you and others like you. The world deserves to be positively infected with your kind of laughter, love, hope, fighting spirit when things are both good or bad, your memories dad… I’m going to do my part to tell the world about you and I bet the more people who know about your life the better off the world will be. And dad, you loved to serve your country and make the world a better place for everyone. I can’t imagine a better way to perpetuate your service to your country and to the world than to continue sharing all about you with the world.

Dad, facebook is pretty neat isn’t it? You got on facebook I think in about the year 2011? We really didnt talk much through facebook. I don’t know if I regret that or not. Probably not because I saw you in person nearly every single day. And for a while now I’ve literally spent more time with you and mom than I have at my own house. Yeah that’s infinitely better than facebook! It was nice to have both though. Whenever I did see you comment on a post of mine, or like something I posted, I took notice each and every time and I smiled big. I really did. My dad liked what I posted! That’s pretty cool. I havent visited your page hardly ever over the years. I don’t know if I want to right now. That might take some time before I go on your facebook pages. You have two of them! One for your friends who knew you as Larry, and another one for people who knew you as John in the later half of your life. Dad you were always VERY organized, thoughtful, excellent planner, wrote things down etc.. THANKFULLY I was able to easily find your list of passwords and other things like that. I was able to log into your laptop, your email, and both of your facebook accounts. I put the word out in both of them, posting as you, but announcing myself as your son in the very first line, so that all of your facebook contacts could know that you’ve passed on. I don’t know if I want to request to have facebook turn your pages into a memorial yet. I already added myself as your legacy contact. If your accounts get turned into memorial accounts then I will no longer have access to your inboxes. If I can’t get into your inboxes then if someone writes you privately thinking you’re still alive in your body then I won’t be able to let them know otherwise. So for now til I decide what I want to do I will keep your facebook accounts as they are. I love the profile picture you have up! I remember taking that picture of you at the house on the front porch. It’s a great picture of you dad.

So today Mom and I are going back to the funeral parlor to meet with the funeral director at 11 am. We’ve never done any of this before dad so it’s all new to us. You were the one who handled matters like this with paper work and figuring things out. Your body will still be in the viewing room but you won’t be there to handle this as you always did so easily. It’s going to be hard but we can do it dad. We are told there will be lots of paper work. I have no idea how long this will take, or what it all consists of, but so far the funeral director has been so helpful in all of this. We picked a good funeral parlor by all accounts so far.

So dad, I hope you don’t mind all these public posts I’m making for the whole world to see. I need to for my own therapy. It may be a little self ish on my part. I am hurting. I miss you so much and I am sure I will miss you every day for the rest of my life even if I live to be 100, which I don’t think I want to live that long by the way. My second most important reason for writing this is because I believe you are receiving my love, dad, and I want you to feel love overflowing for eternity. You deserve that and I’m hoping I deserve that, too. My third most important reason for writing all these posts for the whole world to see is, like I mentioned before, you loved being of service to your country and for the whole world to be a better place for everyone, and what better way can I help you accomplish that dad than to share with the whole world about my Dad, Dad. It’s not about forcing anything, but just about sharing to anyone anywhere who intrinsically wants to receive your light.

Dad, a life span on earth is so short compared to eternity. I will see you again shortly. I cannot wait to see you again dad. While back here on earth living in this temporary body I have it sure seems like an eternity to have to live the rest of this life without you, but I know in reality this is nothing and we will be together again Shortly. Thats what I said to you when I last saw you in your temporary body. I said see you again shortly ok? And you nodded yes and gave me a quick wave. I thought I would see you again shortly like I ALWAYS had. But this time it will be in heaven. And I know it will be heaven because you are there and that is where I want to be. One day not far from now you, me, mom, jason, and soooooo many others will be in heaven together and that is for eternity. That’s the real treasure. It’s not here on earth. But that’s not to discount the treasures that can be had here on earth. That’s not reason to not live this life to the fullest. You lived your life in your temporary body to the fullest and you fought to do so even when things were bad and not easy. Most people quit when things are too hard. Its easy to be well when things are going well. It’s a true show of character, soul, and spirit to squeeze all you can out of life even when life is the toughest. Dad, I believe you know about that just as much as anyone and especially more than the average person. You struggled to breath for at least a dozen years before your passing. Whatever one struggles with in life, Breathing is a vital behavior because without it your body is dead.

Well dad, mom just got up. I think I typed out mostly everything I wanted to for now, a day after your services. And we need to meet with your funeral director in about an hour and forty minutes from now.

I will see you again shortly ok?

I love you,

-Tom

p.s. Dad this is really hard on me. I go back and forth constantly between feeling better and feeling worse again. Be patient with me. I know your dad passed on when you were even a little bit younger than me when you passed on. So you know what I’m going through. I could never totally empathize but of course I was sorry dad that your dad passed away so long ago. I never even got to meet him, my grandpa Larry. He passed on before I was even born. I don’t have any kids. You never got to be a grandpa. If I ever have kids ill be in the same shoes as you dad. Ill be making sure your grand kids know all about their grandpa they never got to meet. You would have been the best grandpa ever. I don’t want to say I regret not making you a grandpa because I know you admired my sense of responsibility, among other things, not loosely getting a woman pregnant and creating a disastrous situation. Dad you were always incredibly responsible in every way. I want to be responsible, like you, too. And so far I am. In love I have not been as lucky as you. I mean, you and mom have your problems like every marriage does, but you found mom and she found you. It all started on a blind date. I guess the blind date went well dad? =) 44 years of marriage. WOW! Most people divorce and maybe some of them rightfully so. Others divorce because they don’t want to work past there problems. You and mom worked passed your problems. Right up to the end dad you LOVED doing things for mom. I guess I didn’t really appreciate that until after your passing because when you and mom did have your problems here on earth it did upset me GREATLY. Sorry to ramble dad. Ok we have an hour and 32 minutes til mom and I have to see the funeral director now..LoL See you again shortly dad..

Bye for now.