www.orgasmicpathways.com

When I say I ache for that make out kiss at the stroke of midnight New Years Eve it’s the connection I’m aching for because that’s what makes a kiss really great anyway.

It could be any day of the year. NYE is just another date on the calendar.

I could have cared less about finding someone for a solid dozen years.

These days I have put intention out into the universe..

Merman in active search of goddess mermaid for a natural, organic, deep emotional connection to share and co-create endless beautiful experiences with while we are still here on planet earth.

I have my deep passions such as dance, music, and nature.

I feel I’m overdue for a true best friend with whom we cannot keep our hands off each other. A natural unforced connection. Laughter, odd humor, critical thinking, multifaceted personalities, emotionally connected, sexually stimulating..

I’d rather be single than to settle for less. So I am single. But, I’m going to give this intention my best effort because it’s not just about me. It’s also about her, whoever this mystery goddess is.

I feel like when her and I finally find each other we are both going to feel rescued in a way.

-Tom

AnnMarie Calandra BresciaHappy New Year ! May It Be Happy Healthy Magickal And Bright ! Wishing U All Ur Dreamz Come True ! Blessings…

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JaCe Mc NultyI mean I think we had a moment many yrs ago Mr dear Sir happy new yr love

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Sian LindemannBlessings on your wish

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Linda EngelmannI dream that for you kiddo

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Jax X X Smolaz

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Marykay Sieber

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Cyndi YoungI would suggest writing all that you would like in a partner, lots of details, and then setting it aside. Later, after you’ve found one another, you can look and see how you’ve perfectly manifested the woman of your dreams. Worked for me! Good luck to you and Happy New Year, my friend!

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Beth GilletteCyndi Young & Tom Birkenmeyer our marvelous friend, Jodi Paige , did the same thing as Cyndi here. She wrote out a list of attributes she felt she most desired… and she found him and married him a short time later. Just be very clear on what you desire… and why. I confess, I have never actually done this myself, written it out. I held certain values in my heart and somehow trusted and enjoyed following where the wind blew me. I felt the Universe was on my side and I didn’t personally want to limit myself to just what I thought I knew. I guess I wanted it to surprise me. And it has! Tom, I hope it surprises you in a wonderful way this year. It seems you’re doing the right stuff, just doing your thing and enjoying life. That’s how love always surprises me – when I least expected it.As they say, “just be ready for what you ask for!”

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Jodi PaigeActually BethI met John in our theatre staff positions*{mutual shared passion}*

and wrote out the Expectation List after they asked me Why I was willing to spend this kind of time with a 23 yr old (i was 36)i asked him if he were simply curious or felt it was his job to talk me out of it. he said Curious so i wrote out my check list with little stage mgmt boxes in front and then realized it really describes him. Shared passions and interests are KEY(dance lessons good, tavern with open mics and live music = good…Opposites attract ~ for a while Shared goals dreams visions values hobbies; vital

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Sophia MayaAnd Love is on her way

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Zoila Kay AndinoHappy new years blessings always

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Jani Thorunn LarssonHappy New Year!

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TenderSurrender Michelle

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Patty SalvackVery well written! Happy New Year Tom.

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Karen Rocke StickneyI hope you Find that dream and special kiss.

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Tom BirkenmeyerSee, look at that? I’m more emotionally connected and self-expressive than, “show me your boobs” or “hey what’s up” which represents most of the guys on Facebook! LoL for all I know my unknown mystery goddess will come across this and be impressed I rise to the level of literacy on social media.

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Marlowe LeeTom Birkenmeyer i met my husband on FB and he moved all the way from America to Australia. We have been married for 10 years

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Brittany AdamavichI love this

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Cindy McNeilly KuzielaAwww. That melted my heart.

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Wendy MatchenNo words.

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Susan SimmermonHere’s to another year around the sun and may your mermaid goddess appear this time

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Debra LuceWhat you want us what we all want.It’s so elusive and I wonder if I’ll ever find him… x

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Nicole LacinaYou will find her!

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Carol J NotarSo beautifully said…hoping that for myself as well! Happy New Year!!’

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Andrea NobleGood luck!

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Alicia Marie

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Meg SkrypkunI like this Thoreau quote, but note, even though I realize you aren’t “chasing” anything, I think this is still fairly applicable to how you are going about what you have put out into the universe…Happy New Year !!!!!

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Kimberly MillerVery well said! I truly hope you find her, Tom. You’re a good man. Happy New Year!

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Jaitara JaydeHolding this vision for you

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Ann ElizabethI feel the same way as you about this…you will find each other.

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Lori LaGrowI had a soulmate who passed so I am grateful I got to experience it but I know there is another person who is out there…..don’t settle for less! I agree it’s better to be single than in a bad relationship.

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Ileana Hope MerrittOh Tom you are loved and adored for the beautiful soul you are… just keep loving yourself and you will be the magnet your already doing it… she is on her way

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Glenda Jean Sherrod Deaton

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Teri GambleThat’s beautiful!

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Angela Loggins

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Kathy Meyer KomaterWell Tom I truly hope this happens for you soon because you deserve much love & happiness. I’m sending you a couple videos I hope might help. I’m also going to pray for this to happen. We live on a free will planet so if you don’t believe in God it’s ok. When she does show up please let me know. It’s very important for me to say thank you prayers when my prayers are answered. https://youtu.be/0xknBmy8lfchttps://youtu.be/AveQy56Ffl8

YOUTUBE.COMThe Most Effective Way To Manifest Love. Period.The Most Effective Way To Manifest Love. Period.

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Itatiaia XiaKathy Meyer Komater ohhhh I just found out about him…I think he is Amazing with an incredible story! Thank you for sharing this video! I am sure it will be valuable. I will watch it too

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Kathy Meyer KomaterItatiaia Xia you’re very welcome sweetie. I haven’t yet met Tom in person but I hope to some day. He is a very unique person. Unlike anyone I’ve ever known. We’ve had many conversations. He is very kind smart & talented. If I was younger & looking for romance I would totally fall for him. I consider him to be part of my soul family. I truly hope some day a really nice lady crosses his path & will give him the love he truly deserves. I’m going to keep praying for that to happen. Several months ago I was in a depressed state & made a post. Tom reached out to me. That was the moment I knew how truly special he is. He was just checking to see if I was ok. & Yeah people are very busy living their lives. But that was the moment that touched me deeply. That’s when I knew this guy is extra special.

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Ileana Hope MerrittKathy Meyer Komater he’s awesome

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Janet Schabow StearnsShe is out there! And you will know when you meet her or soon after!!

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Stacy Lundstrom

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Maryam LorenaI’ve been there, trapped in that place where we want to make things work so bad that we start twisting ourselves into a version of ourselves that doesn’t feel real or honest or even comfortable. A version that requires us to put on an act, to perform just so we can hold on to someone we desperately don’t want to lose.Sometimes the changes start small. We think we’re compromising and learning to work together, because those are behaviors we’ve been taught we need to master in healthy relationships. But then the changes get bigger and more drastic, and we realize that compromising only works when both people are invested and willing to give and take.Otherwise, we’re just putting ourselves last. We’re saying that who we are and what we need matters less. That we matter less.And honestly, once we get to that place, a place where we’ve lost basic respect and care for ourselves, the relationship is over. Even if we stay together. Don’t ever abandon yourself dear one.

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Crystal WeimeVery nice picture Well stated and crossing my fingers it happens for you

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Lisa Leanne

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Lisa Moore

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Angel BievereWell Tom , I’m a mermaid that lives next to the ocean and I’ll welcome a merman any day! LolBeen looking for a watery sensitive sign!!We shall live on sushi !! Lol

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Becky McClureOkCupid.com or Facebook dating

OKCUPID.COMOkCupidOkCupid

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Margo NymanI am in my longest relationship of my life and I met him at 42. 5 years going strong over here. Your person is out there Tom Birkenmeyer

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Christine HuffAnd so you will find this person. The universe can answer what would seem like infinite possibilities.

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Tom BirkenmeyerFacebook is a place where quality of communication goes to die. This Thread has a lot of quality communication. Thanks everyone.

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Angel BievereTom Birkenmeyer that’s strange Tom I have the same kind of stars hanging outside my door!! and that door faces the ocean LMAO

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Patty SalvackIt looks like you have nutured alot of quality friendships!

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Pandora JoyHeartfelt and beautifully said………..

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Carrie WennstromYou are a good hearted person…they will find you at the right time

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Tom BirkenmeyerI’m actually going to add this post along with the entire thread of comments to my blog site just because the comments are so cool and thoughtful. I’ll do that and probably the next few days or so because I’m sure there are going to be more great comments coming up soon

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Ileana Hope MerrittRemember this Tom … not just bang but she will be your all

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Lin LadySeleneI hope you find her soon!

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Misty Dawn

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Dawn MillerSending love

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Carie WalkerGlad to see you on here. How’ve things been? I moved to a house w my service animals. I hope you find a very, special person. sending happy vibesReply

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Nivea HenriquesHello handsome!!!Reply

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Nancy Waldropbe blessedReply

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Kelly RiddleI love your authenticity. Putting positive vibes in your direction!Reply

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Billie ThompsonSending love you are so hot Tom sure girls are fighting over youReply

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Janet J. HirthMay 2023 be the year you find your soulmate. She’s out there! You’ll find her when you least expect it! Don’t give up and good for you knowing just what you want! *Hugs*Reply

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Jennifer Ream

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Top fanMalachi GutierrezYeah I’m with ya in that one brother. I’m waiting for my queen as well. I hope she comes to her senses soon!Reply

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Nat E LeValleyI’ve been here the whole timeReply

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Carol J Tate LasasGood luck!! I hope you find her!!Reply

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Top fanMichelle Kinchhttps://youtu.be/UjJBGDwKWgs

YOUTUBE.COMTWIN FLAMES Miracle Manifestation Music ∞ Love of Attraction ✾ Quantum Energy Healing Sound TherapyTWIN FLAMES Miracle Manifestation Music ∞ Love of Attraction ✾ Quantum Energy Healing Sound Therapy

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Stacy HirshHello! how have you been?Reply

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Angel BievereThis mermaid lives next to an ocean waiting for a Merman!!Reply

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Lauri BingamanBeautiful, that type of love is definitely worth waiting for, Reply

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Theresa Cesari-AndersonLove this!Reply

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Top fanDenise BooteYou’ll find her! You’re a beautiful soul and deserve an amazing woman!Reply

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Brenda Kingston-Geller

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Vera KnightSo beautiful. Your energy is calling her to you. She is on the move. Happy New Year!Reply

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It’s not stress or being oppressed as if you are human property.
It’s acceptance, understanding, a celebration of differences as well as similarities.
It’s supportive of growth.
It’s a chemistry with a best friend with whom you cannot keep your hands off of each other.
It’s a safe place of peace and love.
It’s a merman with long hair in a union with a goddess mermaid. Where on Earth is she?!?

-Tom

Bonnie BonsaiAll correct! Love is unconditional and people forget that.

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Shannon LyonsPerfect Im amazed at how uou have grown, can you feel your mom grinning?

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Tom BirkenmeyerShannon Lyons the one who passed away? She smiles at me every day.

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Maria Angelita RosalezVery well written

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Jodi Paigei dunno but if you’re brave enuf to do that dating app stuff this is a great profile pic and opening statement, well, i wud edit it slightly for you

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Tom BirkenmeyerJodi Paige thank you

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Jodi Paigeyah Tomkeep me posted

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Wendy RaaschYou deserve love

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Pamela WeberMaybe she’s not in Wisconsin. Time to travel a bit more?

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Tom BirkenmeyerPamela Weber In my traveling observations people are people no matter where I go but hey I keep my heartspace open

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Deanna Pabich…life is a great ride enjoy the twists, turns and curves for they add to your heartbeat

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Tom BirkenmeyerDeanna Pabich That’s an interestingly attractive way to frame it!

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Tom BirkenmeyerI think I’m going to add this to my blog site. I really like how it represents me. Going to add the one about what a New Year’s kiss means to me as well. Before you know it I’m going to have a collection of these sappy romanticized pieces.

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Sherri SentieriLove this. Love that Picture of you Tom you look good. Must be all those green drinks you share on fb

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Jessie SamolykJeez, this is precisely how I feel.

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Theresa Cesari-AndersonAwwe

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Jacqueline Yvonnehttps://youtu.be/rs8DiJaLhlYI loved this movie!!

YOUTUBE.COMOndine HD Trailer Starring Colin FarrellOndine HD Trailer Starring Colin Farrell

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Crystal WeimeAgreed… A worthwhile union is one you don’t have to chase or change yourself for… And couldn’t agree more as far as it being a place of peace

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Tom BirkenmeyerCrystal Weime I totally agree with you too. I hate the concept of chasing or being chased.

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Asta LeveneDon’t worry about butterfly… mend your garden… butterfly will come… … when it’s a time…

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Tom BirkenmeyerAsta Levene I’ve got quite the figurative garden over here. It’s amazing really.

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Nicole BavlnkaI agree with what you wrote.many are broken from life healing wounds.i myself am healing because I want love. I want exactly what you wrote, my fear is am I good enough? As crazy as that sounds it’s a fear I’m addressing with professional help.

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Angel BievereGoddess mermaid, perfect description!

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Jo LovettI totally agree

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I’m going to be vulnerable knowing I’ll be gas lit by someone.

I’ve been forming this conclusion for a while. I think I’m pretty close and pretty sad over it.

When I go out social dancing I genuinely do have fun for myself; but only myself and the friends I might be with. I typically feel more alone in a crowd than I do when I’m by myself.

Ladies In the world, on the dance floors, the farmers markets, at the concerts, walking by me on the street, or attending the different socials I’m attending… I struggle with the most basic of connection; eye contact, a smile, or even noticing my existence.

I’m constantly attracted to ladies who are not attracted to me. They don’t even notice I exist. It stings. When I say attracted I mean their aura and how they carry themselves. I’ve always asked the universe, why am I attracted to ladies who do not notice I exist? I do not understand this setup. I’m not talking about a deep attraction, just the kind of attraction you have by her energy and how she carries herself. If her energy is attractive I am filled with a desire to get to know her and see what she’s about, if there is chemistry there, a deeper connection that can be mutually experienced and worth exploring together.

I’ve observed for a long time that guys treat girls very poorly; often times under a facade of someone desirable. Girls have put their guard up so high they don’t allow any kind of connection or eye contact with a guy. They are so use to being sexually objectified, hurt so badly, or just over all being treated so poorly that it just isn’t worth it anymore.

It’s so bad I feel like any time I’m in the presence of a girl who doesn’t know me by default I’m inherently enemy number one because I’m a man. So, I don’t dare approach any of them to say hello, to ask them to dance, or anything. How sad is that?

I see indications of this all the time. Not just offline but online too. Straight ladies are posting how they’d love to be privately messaged by other women than by men. They don’t even need to explain why, I know exactly why. It makes a little too much sense.

When I’m out social dancing, girls are typically dancing with other girls instead of guys unless they are with somebody like a boyfriend. Their are always those one or two guys on the dance floor trying to dance socially with other girls but none of them will have anything to do with the guy even if they aren’t doing anything inappropriate.

I’m not going to go out there and try to be social with other girls, ask them to dance, or do anything because I don’t want to put myself through that kind of rejection. I’m painfully consciously aware that through projection I am enemy number one because I’m a man and that is such a depressing conclusion. I would rather go out for myself, feel alone in a crowd, truly enjoy myself, and leave myself open to the possibility of a meaningful connection I could truly enjoy with someone else.

Both girls and boys are falling dangerously into self loathing and depression. There are a plethora of different companies measuring happiness in various societies around the world and the United States consistently ranks 1st or 2nd to dead last. Our rates of suicides seem to constantly hit new highs. There are many factors that go into these stats. The thesis of my post is certainly a contributing factor because everyone innately wants to give love and feel truly loved.

I don’t know what the solution is other than the obvious, we need to treat each other with more kindness, but that’s never going to happen. The question becomes, how does an individual person deal? As for me the broader scope solution is to enjoy myself regardless of how others behave and be open for possibilities.

I don’t have any answers for myself on finding a meaningful connection with a goddess. I’m already socially “off” and a little awkward. Couple that with the fact girls built walls of caution so high it’s made me enemy number 1 for the crime of being a man.

Society consists of people creating problems and then responding to their problems in the worst of ways. Society is so much of a turn off for me I want nothing to do with it except for the very remote possibility of meaningful connections of all kinds not just a romantic one. I’m sympathetic to the reasons girls have built walls of caution. Being cautious can literally save a persons life. But to build them so high they no longer resemble anything balanced is just creating more emotional pain for both boys and girls.

All of us need some healing. I recognize the valid caution girls have. My expressions in this post are just as valid. Understanding instead of gaslighting would be a nice start to a more kind and happier society.

I wonder?

-Tom

Comments left on facebook up to sept. 24th..

139 Comments

Shana WankelYou have SUCH a good heart, Tom. I think you’re wonderful. Always have, always will.

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Tom BirkenmeyerShana Wankel Thank you my friend

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Meg SkrypkunI know I try not to have those walls, but, my walls started long ago before I even started dating and they are truly a…bitch to chisel at.

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Meg SkrypkunYou are a wonderful person in my eyes and I always hope the best for you.

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Michele LynnI hear all this negative energy from you. Maybe that’s what others see. Your lack of confidence in you. Have belief in yourself. Belief in you is attractive to everyone. I was beating them off with a stick. Men, women and all ages. Be happy. Like yourself. Enjoy all you have to offer and people will be attracted to your energy.

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Tom BirkenmeyerMichele Lynn The negative energy is objectivity in how I am observing societal trends. Thankfully I am extremely confident in myself that’s never been an issue. I love me. I’m just disgusted with society.

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Michele LynnTom Birkenmeyer then what you put out is what you get. You put out that energy. Whatever energy you put out is what you get in return. No need for validation.

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Michele LynnTom Birkenmeyer if your busy taking care of you and what you need, you don’t notice others. You love yourself so you don’t need others to notice it because you don’t care what others think. You love yourself. That’s the best advice from someone who would rather be by myself then to validate others insecurities. People love me because I sing, dance and enjoy myself. I laugh at myself and I help good people who help themselves.

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Stacy WachalMichele Lynn Michele is right here. You may love yourself but the beliefs you described and thoughts you put out there from that description Tom is what’s keeping you from meeting that open woman. Because they feel what you described in your vibration or aura as you put it. So although your intention is a good one your thoughts are different. Work on your belief and thoughts and once you change those those woman will come a running. Remember energy goes where are thoughts go. Energy is your vibration and aura. Change those thoughts and beliefs through healing and your good to go. Have a great day.

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Belinda HaynesI personally, think you have it all going for you. I’d say, I sense a balance from you. The things that make you different, awkward, are your strengths Next time, ask that woman you have an attraction to for that dance. There is absolutely nothing to lose, but, possibly something to gain. Rejection is tough, however, it’s truly their loss. You never know what could come of it. Hold that handsome head up.

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Tom BirkenmeyerBelinda Haynes I appreciate you have that view of me but I have zero sense of community on planet earth. I’m softly indirectly rejected on the daily.

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Belinda HaynesTom Birkenmeyer To be honest, neither do I. I don’t connect with many ppl. Don’t get me wrong, I can talk to anyone, however, I don’t connect on a deeper level. And, that’s what I’m about. I think you’re on a deeper awareness level than most. That makes it difficult. I get it. Just know, there is nothing wrong with you. Hugs

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Stacy WachalTom Birkenmeyer this is normal for most awakened people who have come here to learn about ourselves. Once you start putting it out there you will slowly find your tribe Tom. I’ve been alone for most of my life. Learning that your number one and loving myself wholly. You’ve got this once your whole they will show up in your life.

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Robin ParsonsMaybe your aura is reflecting all those thoughts thereby deflecting them.

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Robin AngelI love smiling at and accepting compliments from men, enjoying their small provisions: opening the door, complimenting my dress, giving me a place in line ahead of them, recommending something etc….. This post is just a cue to do so even more. I love the glow that a man gets when a woman receives these things, that he would do anyway, because he is just naturally drawn to, but often gets ignored or looked at like he is weird. It doesn’t always need to be assumed that it’s going to lead to anything beyond the interaction, or that he “wants something”. It’s simple respect ..I’d respond this way to a father, brother , or friend xx More simple masculine/feminine kindness out there among strangers!

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Tom BirkenmeyerRobin Angel you’re a goddess. I love your openness and self given freedom to just be; to give and receive. You give me a lil bit of hope. Where are the goddesses in my neck of the woods who share your driving philosophies??

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Robin AngelTom Birkenmeyer Maybe some of them are simply unaware of how to communicate in a Feminine way. They feel they need to defend, be on guard, figure it out and lead men instead of feel, open, receive, and be led. A lack of strong loving dominant men in who made it safe for them to do so. I don’t know if this is fact, just speculation xx

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Tom BirkenmeyerRobin Angel you could be on to something. I love how deep thinking and deep feeling you are. I resonate with that because that’s how my brain feels.

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Kaitlin OwenTom Birkenmeyer this post

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Areya DivyanaYou are awesome, so please don’t take offense when I say- something in your energy (thoughts, beliefs, words) is vibing out to attract people that aren’t quite aligned. Maybe focus on a little more self mind healing. Go within. When things flow in the way your describing, the universe is usually trying to nudge you to go within and do some inner work of some sort. Kind of like a dark night of the soul a little. Caution is healthy but only enough to where it makes the other person actually put in effort and get to know the person, not be totally repellant.Have you considered relocating?You’ll figure it out and eventually attract someone better than you could have imagined.

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Tom BirkenmeyerAreya Divyana That’s excellent advice. You are a well of great ideas worth exploring. I’ve thought about relocating after enough traveling of discovery. If I were to travel to a place where I felt more community, I could see myself moving.

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Areya DivyanaTom Birkenmeyer the community here in Nw Arkansas is amazing. We are blessed to have a very supportive tribe. Nice music scene in Fayetteville. I just moved here a year and a half ago. There’s extended community in Missouri also. Amazing naturey spots. Also in a little know crystal vortex. Plenty of mining downstate.

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Michelle ReneeI know at least one woman who looked in your eyes and smiled a real smile…

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Tom BirkenmeyerMichelle Renee You have me standing at correction

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Michelle StewartI have the same issue only with all the wrong men

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Tom BirkenmeyerMichelle Stewart I feel your pain or frustration.

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Michelle StewartYou’re an awesome guy Tom! Don’t ever change

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Jennifer Renee GordonNot sure who it was, but there was a guy who went out every day and purposely looked for rejection. It was silly- like going to a fast food place and asking for 1/2 off or Starbucks and asking for 1/2 off knowing that there was no way they would say yes. It got him used to hearing no and not being afraid of rejection.As for society, I agree with you on people being anti-social in social settings. Too much time spent with their heads in their phones. They don’t know how to interact with real people in front of them. You have a very strong, beautiful, deep personality – (I have not met you in person) – and I think shallow people are afraid when they see you. They are probably lost inside their own heads and don’t know what to do with you. I also recommend getting out there and trying different things and places. When I was in Delaware, it was much different than out here in Arizona.Wish you all the best. Thanks for sharing this.

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Tom BirkenmeyerJennifer Renee Gordon I remember hearing those stories too about people going for ‘no’. All kinds of psychological benefits to that. Thank you for adding your comment jennifer.

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Kristen MaryOk, I totally and completely understand what you are feeling. But just because women don’t seem interested doesn’t mean you are correct. I think a lot of women are done chasing men and we want to be pursued again. We want a man that takes initiative and plans a date. No one ever wants to feel rejected but how is someone to know you are interested if you don’t approach? So, I think maybe going in without the intention of a date maybe just be friendly and make new friends and go from there. You never know. I don’t date anymore but I’m not jaded or guarded I just enjoy my own peace and not really wanting to right now. I will make new friends and that’s all. It takes pressure off.

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Tom BirkenmeyerKristen Mary I agree. The mind set of making new friends is the way to go and just let a romantic connection happens if one is meant to be.

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Kristen MaryTom Birkenmeyer yes! When we were young I think connections happened fast because there was no baggage to unpack but as a 55 yo I have lots and so do the men I meet. It has to be more purposeful and takes time to get to know someone anc the convection grows!

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Tom BirkenmeyerKristen Mary “When we were young I think connections happened fast because there was no baggage to unpack”I never thought about it that way before. I am 100% that is a huge contributing factor.

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Jayne FisherKristen Mary yes so true about no baggage back then now I’m 55 divorced for while , it’s different most comes with lot baggage I don’t want to deal with

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Kyla McCallHonestly, I have more male friends than female friends. I believe I am cautious, but I have found men treat me more kindly than women ever have. Yet, I too, have fallen into the trap of being socially awkward & realizing the men I want don’t want me in return. I know how to love, but I don’t how to be loved, as no one ever has ever loved me — all the while seeing men dating the most vicious women who treat them so badly.I don’t know if anything I say will do any good, but what you’re doing is pretty much all you can do. Just live for yourself. Love yourself. And be happy for yourself. Trust me, I know sometimes that is easier said than done. Sorry I don’t have any words of wisdom.

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Stacy WachalKyla McCall key words in this lovely comment to me are. We as woman struggle at knowing how to receive love and allow ourselves to be loved. What a wonderful reminder thank you.

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Pamela WeberTom Birkenmeyer I hear you. You are a wonderful person. I’m not saying you should change yourself. Be you. However in dancing specifically (because I have been out dancing with you), showing more confidence is something that people generally like…men and women. And confidence is a positive trait. In Latin dancing specifically, speaking for myself (however other women would probably agree), whether you know what you’re doing or not, ask for that dance, with confidence. Women are generally gentle saying no when social Latin dancing. And men don’t generally get offended by that.

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Sherry WestphalAwe think most kind people feel that way

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Tom BirkenmeyerSherry Westphal I think you’re right. We’ve created a society to foster that unfortunately.

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Sherry WestphalTom Birkenmeyer always be with people you love and trust and respect your heart grows

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Sherry WestphalTom Birkenmeyer there is so much beauty in life

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Tom BirkenmeyerSherry Westphal some of the beauty where I get to live

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Sherry WestphalTom Birkenmeyer good for you it’s in the heart

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Jodi PaigeI find this confession and the setting of dancing in a bar very interesting because i met my bff, business partner and twin flame on the dance floor in Las Vegas at the Sand Dollar. We’re housemates now after having a solid friendship and working relationship for almost 3 years. I was mesmerized by the way they danced; uninhibited original creative pure freedom, like i did and hence we connected …we’re 35 years apart and yet act like teenagers and feel like family. It was just as you describe; energy, interest, engagement and it’s the most unusual relationship I have. There was no male/female energy exchanged. It’s classic twin flame. The highest chakra. Rare. So rare. You’ve been so patient….I think you’re still on the right track and yes, I agree with your observations; people are in a lot of pain lately and we’re pummeled with propaganda of fear and hate to keep us divided. You’re so radically individual ~ and that’s highly attractive ~ to those that know …

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Tom BirkenmeyerJodi Paige that is so beautiful and reading your words really resonated with me. You’re one of the few people on my facebook that I know In person. I miss you!

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Jodi PaigeTom Birkenmeyer

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Deborah ArakiThe times I have met you and spent some time, I didn’t think you were awkward at all, I thought you were awesome! Still do!

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Tom BirkenmeyerDeborah Araki sometimes it just depends on the person I’m with You pulled out of me someone who is not off or awkward.

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Deborah ArakiTom Birkenmeyer well, I thought and still think, you are fun and easy to be with!! Too bad I’m 25 years older..

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Tom BirkenmeyerDeborah Araki my mind is blown you are 25 years older

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Deborah ArakiTom Birkenmeyer omg.. just turned 70! Freaked me out!

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Carolyn ClapperDeeming oneself as “enemy number one” seems like a projection. I can’t imagine anyone thinking of you in that way. Assuming that most or all of any gender is one way seems self defeating and self fulfilling.Perhaps try and live in the moment, with no expectations… just be. You’re an amazing human, and have great energy and magnetism. It will happen!Women should be cautious or aware to a degree around men they don’t know. It doesn’t mean they’re damaged or guarded. It just means they’re aware that sometimes seemingly good men are capable of doing bad things. Especially in venues like bars or clubs etc. They’re maybe just being smart.That said, know that when you’re out at places like this, as opposed to meeting a woman through another friend at a dinner party or gathering etc, they may not be as willing and ready to warm up, open up, or be relaxed and inviting. I smile at everyone, and toss out compliments like they’re Halloween candy. Lol… but that’s rare. And I don’t give two shits if people think I’m weird, or gay, or naive, or whatever. That’s on them. When I man is a gentleman to me, I love it! I smile and thank him. It makes my day! I raised my son to be that type of human. To open doors for women and be warm and kind and thoughtful. Many women just adore him and love how thoughtful he is. It’s beautiful to see.Just keep being you, and straighten that unicorn horn, and get back out there!

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Tom BirkenmeyerCarolyn Clapper oh if you only knew. P.S. I wrote you back july 12th and 24th.

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Carolyn ClapperTom Birkenmeyer so… you’re suggesting I don’t? … and yes, I’m currently backed up on messenger and emails. So sorry. I’ll get back asap I had some major doctors appointments this month, and these past 2 weeks I’ve been hyper focused on my dog who is dying. There were several nights of zero sleep due to her coughing and crying, unable to get her into the vet for a few days. I felt she had lung cancer and a secondary infection. Xrays confirmed. A large tumor in her lung that’s pushing on her trachea, and fever. She’s been on antibiotics now for a week and had improved so much. All raw food for her, and so so much spoiling and cuddle time.Anyways… this is why I’ve been mia. Keep your chin up

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Tom BirkenmeyerCarolyn Clapper I’m sending your dog some healing vibrations and some rest and rejuvenation for you. I sincerely hope your dog and your family is going to be okay. My messages will be waiting for you for when the time is right for you.

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Rachel RavenI dont know why this is happening in your life.Im sorry. I do think this is a very difficult place to meet and bond with people .I’m not sure why.I don’t think it’s a crime to feel awkward or any spectrum of the human experience. It’s all beautiful in a way .I think sometimes we are forced to dive into layers of how we really connect romantically versus what we fantasize about. It takes courage. Anyways , you deserve it and I know it’s out there for you. Just keep developing your heart .Its is so painful sometimes I understand. .

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Heather FordYour entire post is dead on-It’s sad- but I believe true.

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Tom BirkenmeyerHeather Ford simple but true. Hey check your messages.

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Akash AnuWe must heal ourselves from the inside out to be in alignment & an energetic match to what we desire. This is how we act as a magnet for what we truly desire. After experiencing this first hand, I’m grateful to help others experience this as well. I’d be happy to help with an infinite alchemy session if it resonates to work with me. Sending you so much love my friend!

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Kimberly MillerI’ve never succeeded at connections, so I couldn’t even begin to guess how to get past the bs. It is sad that things are the way they are and that mistreatment, or at the very least, disappointment, is so common that the walls go up in the first place.

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Tom BirkenmeyerKimberly Miller in an unrelated matter you are one of my longest running friends on planet Earth and I think that’s pretty awesomeHeather?

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Kimberly MillerTom Birkenmeyer same!

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Jen BialeckiTbh I am honestly shocked you are still single You’ve always been one of the most radiant and positive people I know even when going through some very dark times…that’s the sort of thing that people should be attracted to and admire. And from the times we’ve hung out, you didn’t strike me as awkward at all and certainly not creepy or like you have shallow motives toward females. You’re far more respectful than the average male. I don’t know….maybe it is a self esteem thing with the women you’re attracted to? It does seem like that old saying “Nice guys finish last” is true, sadly….look how many women end up with toxic douchebags who use, abuse and take them for granted and think it’s an honor to be with someone like that? Maybe the problem is so many people (both male and female) have chased after trash for so long that they have convinced themselves that genuine, compatible people either don’t exist or would never be interested in them (even when that is not true). I haven’t had much success with attraction, either…can sympathize with a lot of this, being that I’m on the unique side, myself. I can tell you though what has helped me to is focus on myself…both working on my issues (we all have them, it’s normal) and just doing what makes ME happy and isn’t destructive behavior, of course LOL Do what makes you happy…channel your loneliness and unhappiness into things that do make you happy. You’re not alone; there’s women who feel this way, too and like minds will find a way to each other eventually. As far as believing all guys are a certain way, I don’t think so….I’ve always felt more comfortable opening up and being around males rather than females. I’ve certainly wasted time on my fair share of loser guys LOL But I know some real gems, too (including you!) and that gives me hope to believe in!

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Melissa ClineIf you were in Atlanta I’d come and dance with you .

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Kathy Meyer KomaterWell Tom your post makes me want to give you a big hug & a kiss on the cheek. I can’t justify or understand the women who react to you in such a negative way. To me you are very special. Besides being physically attractive you are very kind & intelligent. Saturday I went to Moosefest & danced my butt off. Unfortunately it grew back. I’m a dance instigator gently encouraging everyone to dance. I have these 2 silky scarves I dance with & share with people. Girls will just dance with complete abandon. Most guys will just stand & move a little bit so I’ll go next to them & smile & match their moves. Your points are totally valid. Many of us have been hurt so many times that it’s hard to have a deep trusting connection. Several years ago I met a lady online. She lives in Canada. We never met in person. We used to video dance together almost every day. I had never been attracted to a woman before but we fell in love. After about 3 years of being together she ghosted me. I had no idea why. I mean yeah we had some arguments some times. She occasionally caused unnecessary drama with me. After the ghosting I still reached out to her several times. I was like it’s ok if you don’t want me in your life. But please let me know if you are ok. She never responded to me. That’s when I decided to become a celibate monk. I’ll admit I do sometimes miss the intimacy with a human. But I just don’t want to be hurt again. Instead I give love & kindness to everyone I meet. Unfortunately sometimes I accidentally mislead people & I have to say…. I’m sorry. I don’t date. But Tom you are such a wonderful special guy. Somewhere out there is someone who is also special & wonderful. I’m going to pray that this person comes into your life very soon because you deserve to be loved completely.

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Jaitara JaydeTom, thank you for this share. I feel you. I see you. If you’d be open to a Zoom call, I’d love to have a private conversation with you about this. I feel I could help. DM me if this appeals to you.

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Christine GalassoYou’re a really good dancer and you smile, I’m sure that Can be very intimidating for some women.

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Jamie Louise WolfMUAHHHH

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Lisa RemmickI thought you loved me ?? lol

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Jennifer Gammons MujicaI appreciate your openness, Tom. I also sit perplexed— because I have never noticed any of the qualities you mention. We’ve lunched, dined, hiked, shopped with my kids (who are grown up now! )….and it flowed so easily. Hmmm so what does that mean?

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Stephanie Pannell((((( hugs )))))Dearest Gorgeous Tom,I see you. I feel you. I love you!Inspired sharing with love, some of my personal prayers:“In this very moment I am willing to drop all stories keeping me connected to the past experiences of limitation. I am now willing to release everything and anything either known or unknown to me that is keeping me separate from that which I desire. I release and drop all experiences of separateness and powerlessness now.I am willing to disconnect from collective consciousness and move into Holy Spirit communion, Expanded Consciousness, and Divine Sovereignty.I forgive myself for hurting me for so long. I choose to nurture, appreciate and Love myself. I remember to listen to what my body tells me.I remember to love and honor myself, and have a deep sense of Self-worth; so I am able to truly love and honor others, and others are then able to reflect back to me in the most beautiful ways, this love I feel and have for myself.I remember that as a Divine Being in human form, I Am worthy of all the love, beauty, joy, peace and abundance of this universe. I focus only on what I want.It is safe for me to allow the Holy Spirit within me to further activate the Divine genome within my DNA for the liberation of humanity through my remembrance and embodiment of my own Sovereign Divinity.I choose to remember to walk in the Sun of my own Divine Love in every moment.I Am Shining My Light and Living my successful Legacy of Love that is assisting in the ascension to Christ Consciousness of humanity.”When I first awaken in the morning, my prayers are:“Holy Spirit within me, take charge of my DNA, thoughts, words, actions, energy, health, vibrations and life: Be You the Guide, and I the follower. Go ahead of me this day and prepare The Way for grounding Heavenly solutions and realities on Earth, beyond my efforting or understanding. “May the infinite connections and combinations of LIGHT be a blessing unto all creation – through me – in the Name of YHWH.” ~modified KEY 318:86 from The Keys of Enoch

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Caroline VrbaYou are perfect as you are.

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Dawn Delouise BanksAlthough we believe we are evolved as a species we are still very primitive. At the end of the day it’s about survival 1st procreation 2nd.So either they have a wall of protection or they are subconsciously saving themselves for what they believe wil… See more

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Dawn Delouise BanksTo be honest that’s not where you find people to have deep conversations..

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Theresa LePre RiveraWell said

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Maryann CarlsonSo energetically like likes like…you are the magnet of what you are recievingStay possitive and open and everything you would like in a woman and she will appear. The universe works that way.

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Val WardI’ve always had the same issue. Men that I am attracted to aren’t attracted to me and vice versa . Daddy issues maybe ?

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Tracy LynnEverything is dead on true here that you said. Also, recognize, that you are very deep and not many women want or can handle that. Let alone do they understand it. It’s people in general. Tom, some of us are just different and it is so hard to find people who understand or connect. Let alone put up with people like us lmao. Also, you’re extremely (and amazingly) sexual and I’d be terrified to let you down if that makes sense. That part would be very intimidating to me. Also, you’re a very healthy person and that is intimidating too to some who aren’t. The lifestyle I mean…of having a healthy body and healthy eating, working out, etc…Do you remember when everything just dominoed in the beer fridge and I started pouring out sweat lol. Look for the people that sweat your energy….if that makes sense. Because they’re able to feel and connect with your energy. Sometimes your eyes might not always be open either.

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Jody PogorzelskiA lot of what you say resonates a lot. My son and I had a similar conversation this weekend. He mirrors much of what you say here. In an age of online communication and blurred lines, interpersonal communication has gone to the wayside. Both sides are playing it safe. Most spend their time chatting online rather than face to face or even by phone. I’ve lost count the amount of times a guy will say he wants to get to know me, yet will not call to have an actual conversation with me. Messaging is not the same. It’s talking at someone rather than with someone. Everyone has some kind of guard up. It takes people like us to take our guards down and give others a safe space to take theirs down too. I think you’ve done that right here. Stay open!

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Erica StillerJody Pogorzelski you, have literally hit the spot on that! People aren’t connecting in a physical way. Besides work, and normal daily things, we should make time for fun, get out and explore. Have an adult conversation, instead of text or voicemails. I… See more

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Roseann DavisMaybe ur going wrong kind of places .I think not everyone is like that.you need diffrent places to go.i find where I go both genders are nice people .try diffrent type of people diffrent place .think that will do it.

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Winter CantagalloIt’s from your mother and or father wounds (which causes you to express certain patterns and attract certain patterns) If you heal those you’ll have a totally different experience when you go out!

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Winter CantagalloAlso try salsa dancing where the socials are by culture and in general open snd friendly.

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Kelly Ragen-PeaseWinter Cantagallo yaz! We should go!!!

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Brea ZiembaHonestly tom, I think ur ONE OF THEE MOST INCREDIBLE PEOPLE TO EXIST!!! I understand u struggle with socializing, but no one ever improved on something by not trying/practicing. Take me for example, bc I can only speak for myself, but I initiated conversation with u bc I’m social yes, but brave also & intuitive.It’s my opinion a mate for u mite need those qualities. I’m not insinuating me, but DONT GET IT TWISTED! I’d hem u up in a heartbeat. Lol. People fear what they don’t knw & not knowing u is something they should fear Sent with love & genuinity.

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Leanora HalePopping in to say I read all the comments. I wont go towards the things that bugged me about this post instead i will sayRemember yesterday when I said you are being called to travel It’s time my friend

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Nicole LacinaYou are a sweetheart. You are kind, talented and handsome. Maybe you are onto something. There are times, after giving men a chance, that they behaved mind/soul-blowingly poorly. Maybe these women are afraid to be hurt. I have blamed myself (law of attraction stuff – ‘what am I doing that I keep attracting jerks?’). Maybe that is wrong thinking. Maybe it us as simple as that old song ‘You Can’t Hurry Love!??’ All I know is thar you are not alone. Hang in there.

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Tammy RuggaberI hope no one gaslit you. That would be horrible. Hugs n

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Tom BirkenmeyerI’m pleasantly amazed. I was ready for it but nobody has gas lit me. All of the comments have been thoughtful, wonderful, and dare I say even a little validating with some pleasant philosophical ideas.

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Dawn Delouise BanksTom Birkenmeyer The good news is that the world is a candy store.. we are not all the same .

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Tom BirkenmeyerDawn Delouise Banks you’re right. Just give it time and eventually you will see that one sour ball candy that nobody wants to taste and it will be free entertainment for me as long as I don’t put it in my mouth:-)

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Dawn Delouise BanksTom Birkenmeyer yesss .. think about the symbol we grew up with

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Dawn Delouise BanksSometimes you don’t even want the entertainment

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Lindsay StinerTom Birkenmeyer I would snatch you up in a heartbeat. I’ve known you online for quite a while now. And I’m still shocked that no one sees you like I do. You’re absolutely kind caring thoughtful maybe a little old school but I think it’s adorable. You’re adventurous entertaining energetic beautiful you care about your health and Thoes around you. For me you are everything I would ever want in a man. Our distance is far but maybe when the time is right who knows. Love you always my dear sweet friend. Dance your ass off for me. Fyi you got a great ass lol

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Kate ShannonYour presence is noticed and appreciated

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Tom BirkenmeyerKate Shannon thank you. Hey so far I have perfect two year in a row attendance at your Beach Fair art show! There was one band I really enjoyed this year. I think they were called hyperia or something like that? Another person I really enjoyed was a yo… See more

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Kate ShannonThanks so much for coming I am trying to plan another event more of a gallery style soon! And Yes, Hypheria , they are amazing! They played some shows in Milwaukee and Green Bay this weekend ! I’ll try to organize more shows for them in Kenosha and keep you posted or you can follow them via the link! I like the psych /Indie / rock !And Em Bahn plays many shows too. If you want to follow more from her! I love that she incorporates her experiences in nature in her music.

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Tom BirkenmeyerKate Shannon oh cool! Yes she is the one I’m so glad you knew who I was talking about

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Chandra CherryberryWe don’t know each other well but you’ve always seemed like a great person with a great heart. Try putting it out there that the women at the events you go to are drawn to you. Not in a sexual way just a get to know you way. Get out there, take a risk. Even if women are a guarded you can still be out there and be yourself. Women throughout history have been hurt by men. It’s not a new thing. But you’re not those men. So it might start off awkward. Once a woman sees who you are they’ll love you. Also you say the women you are usually attracted to. Well you may need to step outside of your comfort zone amd talk to women who may not initially catch your eye. Be more open to whatever may happen and just be you

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Angie SaundersI think I’m in the category that it’s just not worth it anymore… at my age. I enjoy our conversations and I wished you lived closer. You’re an amazing guy and I mean that.

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Frances LaughsTom, you’re learning to dance and great at it. Just ask and don’t worry about rejection. Take lessons where they teach the men to take the lead, it’s part of dancing that many men don’t get… Also, from experience it difficult to connect with toxic people. They drink soda, alcohol, HFCS and sucralose on a daily basis. Don’t bother trying to make eye contact with them because it’s painful and a connection won’t happen. Plus, so many wear toxic fragrances they are difficult to be near. Or maybe that’s just me. But I’m beginning to turn men down for dances who wear cologne for my own health.

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Tom BirkenmeyerFrances Laughs funny you say that about fragrances. I stopped wearing chemical based stuff probably at least a decade and a half ago. Most people will at least mildly question what goes into their mouth but it’s also worthwhile to question anything that can be absorbed into the skin and breathed through the air. Once you do that you start to make better choices about all kinds of things we put on our bodies and in our environment.

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Angie SaundersTom Birkenmeyer I recently discovered Henry Rose perfume…. Look it up

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Pamela WeberTom Birkenmeyer there are natural fragrances. Nothing better than dancing with a man that smells good.

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Maryam LorenaFirst of all, I want to thank you for sharing your raw authenticity. I find that’s one of the things that make a man very attractive. I believe real fearlessness is the product of tenderness. It comes from letting the world tickle your heart, your raw and beautiful heart. You are willing to open up, without resistance or shyness, and face the world. You are willing to share your heart with others. Loneliness is okay. In fact, it’s the feeling of our beautiful raw vulnerable heart, finally open. Don’t close. Because we can’t get rid of loneliness. We can only open it up to sunshine and healing fresh air.So don’t take the sadness personally, you didn’t do anything wrong. It’ll be okay. It really will. Just breathe. Love yourself. And if you insist on seeking external happiness, seek to root that happiness in your heart.True happiness is maitri. Love and infinite blessings to you dear one.

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Jackie EllaI go out dancing and have fun weather it with a group of people or myself I just get lost in the music people are just strange these days Tom. There’s nothing wrong with you at all.when guys come and dance with me in a group it becomes fun remember it’s all for fun life’s short so do what you please.

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Lisa RenéeThis is a great opening up for women to see what men face. I am certain, you are not alone. We women feel very similar, atleast, I do. I feel very much like humans today view relatio ships in a very disposable way. Fast gratification and no soul. It is saddening. DM me for more chats on this Tom. We always had good vibes!

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Stevie ReddickTom…..I could give you a long, wordy response, but I think the best thing you can do is, if you see a girl you are into, just simply say “hi, my name is Tom….I think you’re cool, would you ever like to hang out?” I’ve never met you in person, but from what I’ve seen, you don’t have a creepy/threatening vibe. Just try, the worst they can say is no.

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Karen L. Close… And when people do say no, that speaks more of them than about you. Try to remember that!

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Beth GilletteThose of us who have spent some time with you know you are an intelligent, sensitive, talented, caring person. I had the chance to observe you during a moment of your attraction for another woman (not “girl,” words matter. Give some thought as to why you often use the words “boys & girls”). My observation of you and the situation was a bit different than your perceptions described here in such a situation. I got the idea that you are attracted to the unavailable. That can be a habit, a self fulfilling prophecy. And a safe, predictable but painful place to exist. My take on your situation is that this pattern you’re experiencing is an invitation for you to do the work to get to your deeply rooted and deeply felt social awkwardness. What is really underneath this feeling and belief? When you finally see and address this I believe this will all change for you.This energy can enter the room before you do, if you know what I mean. It’s not you… but it proceeds you, and with a purpose, for you to work through and genuinely conquer the feelings you just shared. I promise you your world is meant to break wide open up. Sit with these questions for a while and allow them to guide you to your answers. You have so much to offer. I see your world opening up in a big way.

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Tom BirkenmeyerBeth Gillette thank you! Hey I am so curious, when you saw me attracted to another woman in person what did You observe of me? LOL I honestly don’t remember that but it was a few years ago.

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Julie Ann WalvatneTom… You are such an amazing man…I feel blessed to know you personally. You are so very special… and for some women that’s intimidating just as it is for some men by special women. Unfortunately, it’s sad they don’t take a chance in life… they are missing out on getting to know someone like you! Thank you for always being true to who you are and for always treating me so special! Love you 4ever

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Carolena Elizabeth HollifieldI think you’re amazing. It’s rare to find someone like you. Most people follow the herd. I didn’t know just how much until Covid hit. There is someone out there for you. You are a rare gem, therefor you’re going to find a rare gem. Just put it out there and it will come to you. Unique souls instinctively know unique souls. Sending you loads of love. I too have felt the same when I was single. I’m now married to someone who is so different than me, that it can actually be lonely in itself at times. Don’t settle, you’re an amazing catch.

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Tanya S. BrownThank you for sharing your feelings and posting a very mindful and well thought out post. May we all heal one day from our silent battles with ourselves and the world.

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Bonnie HuntsingerWell-said, Tanya.

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Karen L. CloseKeep doing you, people distance because we are getting through a pandemic, not because you are undesirable. I do not like touching during dancing, esp. with strangers at a gathering, and have a group of dancing friends male and female, that meet at events. I recommend you try to stop thinking of yourself as the public enemy number one, people can read that on you… besides, now you’re stereotyping women, assuming that’s what they are thinking. You are a human among humans and relating positively through doing your thing and living your life, will definitely attract... be open to having it happen in a little different way than you expect. Judgment and expectation out the window… The best attractions happen when you least expect it, not when you’re looking for it!

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Linda EngelmannKaren L. Close you definitely hit it on the nail for Tom!

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Linda EngelmannI honestly feel you Tom Birkenmeyer I thoroughly understand your side I feel your feelings. I wish I was your age cause you definitely will not be feeling like that maybe next life.

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Tanya Boulieu U

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Risa Karen GottliebCome back to Bristol! Great place to meet free spirits.

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Tom BirkenmeyerRisa Karen Gottlieb I went three times this year I didn’t meet any free spirits.

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Lisa FeilDidn’t read the whole post. A lot. Just give the same aura you’re looking for and don’t think I’m dancing and they are with friends. You may be giving vibe you’re looking if that makes sense

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Inanna AsherahTom I can honestly say your one of the loveliest man I’ve ever had the fortune to meet ,your funny, charming always uplifting,light as air but also earthy and very attractive I know that the right woman is here for you and your wrong about the world not changing it is, everyday, in a very amazing spiritual way , sometimes it is better to be alone for the right reasons than with someone for the wrong ones, I’m also very alone where I am my daughter is with someone so appalling so horrible I can’t see her ! don’t ever really go out and I don’t want any man than isn’t completely like me ,so I stay single until he arrives ,I know our true loves are just around the corner,I know it!!! And I’d rather cry myself to sleep every night looking out my window waiting And I do knowing the next one will be worthy of me your vibe is extremely high and theirs perhaps not so, not for you if they don’t see it not your problem theirs,if I lived in your town we would be firm friends I love you very much as do alot of people obviously your a great man and I know the divine love you very much also see you on the other side my beautiful friend, I know it’s coming I just know it lots of love as always and big hugs you are a rockstar

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Amanda RetzlaffEverything said here was 100% valid, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with how you express your thoughts or carry a conversation from the few times we’ve chatted , It should always be the vibe you get from someone rather than the automatic view most people have of men or women , I as a person with extreme social anxiety tend to be more standoffish in terms of interacting with a person I haven’t yet met especially if I’m just randomly approached in public , but I don’t automatically label someone off of my own past or personal experiences good or bad , I just try to make quick friendly conversation and if the vibe is right the conversation will flow naturally as will new friendships I think , if it’s right it’ll be right if not let it be , never force an interaction with someone who’s not ready even friends I’ve known personally for years understand that we all have the right times to be approachable and the right times that we need a people break untill the social interaction energy is restored lol

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Kenzie StossHey you don’t have to fit a social norm. You be yourself. Your a unique individual and you should embrace that. Also let friends or a relationship come to you. Let friendships happen naturally. These should never be forced

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Kenzie StossI never met you in person but you seam very approachable.

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Ashleigh LaBossiereTo be wronged is nothing, unless you continue to remember it. -ConfuciusI say this out of kindness and desire for your success & well-being. You’ve definitely been treated wrongly, likely countless times, and you’re carrying “it” around with you in each new encounter. That energy that you’re carrying speaks louder to someone than the actual words you’re saying. Ask the universe “how to let this energy go?” It may be energy healing. It may be grounding/earthing & meditation. It may be screaming out all of your wounds and then after all the energy is expended making the conscious choice to say “I let this go, I am no longer carrying these wounds from my past”. It may be a subtle letting go over time, or it may be instantaneous. It doesn’t matter how you let it go, the important thing is that you let it go. That wounded energy is the reason you’re not finding your community and/or your mate. And while you may be positive about yourself, the negative thoughts you have about society are showing through as negative energy. And you receive what you put put into the world. Allow yourself to truly let go of all previous encounters, and be 100% present in the moment (to be present in the moment means to not be thinking of the past nor expectations of the future). Allow each new encounter to be truly “fresh” (not tainted with remembrance of previous encounters). But as a side note, as someone else mentioned, truly put all your focus into BEing the right person, not finding the right person. For some reason this just unlocks the secret law of the universe. The universe will say, “Okay, he’s ready”. But this will only happen once you’ve truly surrendered “finding someone”. When you’re constantly looking for someone it puts out a desperate energy. When you stop looking, you’ll naturally put out a confident at-ease energy, because you don’t “need” anyone, you are no longer needy. And THAT kind of confidence attracts many. But this ONLY comes when you truly surrender your desire to find someone. The universe knows when you “fake surrender” it. haha Much love & light to you friend. You are on your way right now!

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Ashleigh LaBossiereI hope my message only comes across as sincere. It takes a very self-aware and spiritually grounded person to do what I’m suggesting, but I totally think you are that person.

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Kristin Rose KellyI’d say go for it Tom..nothing to fear but fear itself.. You see the one you want to dance with ask her.. You are very caring and considerate to wonder these thoughts. Always be yourself no apologies

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Andrea NobleWelcome, friend, to the existence that is neurodivergency. You’re not alone.

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J Thorunn LarssonYou sound like my husband. He told me before he knew me he was lied to and gas lit. He said he given up and that is why when we met he was thrilled and told me he was in love with me for a long time and now the rest is history.

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Cindy ElizabethHoping that you’re ok, I read this and was a bit surprised but we all have our own personal feelings toward ourselves, but on the outside I feel you’ve accomplished so much and that should be celebrated! Now, our thoughts (in any situation) really are very powerful and I firmly believe that changing our thought process and the power of positivity really makes a tremendous difference in how ppl see us, well me. I’m no where near perfect and would like to dm you at some point about a few things but how we feel about ourselves and really work on ourselves, trying to be the best version of ourselves… ppl tend to be drawn to that.

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Brigid SteeleGreat insights. We all need healing. You are a wonderful young man. You should be cherished!Reply3w

-Tom

P.s. Have you enjoyed this? Consider sharing this page. You might also enjoy my youtube channel. Subscribing to my youtube and commenting on my videos allows me to keep providing free content while still being financially compensated by the advertisers on youtube. It’s a brilliant model to be able to not charge anyone a fee and still get an income from it. If you like my content I would love to have your support on youtube via subscribing to my channel and commenting on my videos.

If you enjoyed my blog you might LOVE my YouTube video about changing one thing, the direction of your cash-flow, to change Everything:

I went down my first rabbit hole of “MLM Scams” on youtube.

I’m in an MLM and even I agree with the sentiments I saw.

The youtube videos I came across so far are focused on the cult like behaviors of it’s participants. A large plurality of MLM’rs I don’t hang out with because they are annoying and in my lay opinion, not mentally healthy.

My main disagreement with the opinions I saw is they seem to have binary vision. “All of it’s a scam and all of it’s participants are in a cult.” Very few things in life can accurately be depicted in binary. MLM has a lot of nuances in it that will not be recognized by people looking through a binary lens. Like any other industry there are a mix of all different kinds of people and behaviorisms. To skip over that with a binary perspective is lazy.

I got in an MLM in 2007. The one I got into I got into because they didn’t act like a bunch of annoying cultists! There were other reasons too but I was taken by surprise because before going to the event I fully expected a bunch of weirdos drinking spiked koolaid trying to push that stuff on me.

My whole M.O. of how I sell product is this..

I show it to whoever wants to look at it, if they are comfortable sharing their goals with me so I can recommend a specific product that lines up with their goals that’s always helpful, and then I let them know if they wanna try it out great if not no big deal. If someone decides against it I don’t gaslight them. It’s fine. There are over 300 million people in the usa and we are open in other countries as well so I’m pretty sure I will always be able to find people looking for what I have to offer.

Same M.O. with the MLM side of the product. If someone has a financial or a time freedom goal I show them the business side and if they wanna do it great if not no big deal. I don’t gaslight someone who decides against it. It’s fine. Really.

Do I wish ALL MLM’ers operated this way? YES. Will they? Certainly No. Will obnoxious people dissuade me from the industry? Eff no.

Same to you. If you wanna see what I’ve got, product or business, let me know. I’ll show it to you. If you wanna do it great if not no big deal. What a fabulous opportunity to plug my stuff <3

Tom

P.s. If you’d like to work with me I don’t charge any fees I’m not going to sell you something you don’t want or need: http://workwithtom.fireyourboss.xyz

Have you enjoyed this? Was it helpful in breaking some circular thought patterns you might have been stuck in? Do you know anyone who could benefit from this? Sharing is caring. Share with friends and family.

Was this helpful? If so, I would greatly appreciate it if you commented and shared on Facebook and other Social Media, too. You might also enjoy Fire Your Boss & 31 Ways to Raise Money Now.

If you enjoyed my blog you might LOVE my YouTube video about changing one thing, the direction of your cash-flow, to change Everything:

The weekends celebration of life memorial for my mom impacted me emotionally in a way that I didn’t see coming.

It was great to see family again. I loved that.

To have my mom pass away and then to go home and not have a family experience for a full year later is something else that I can’t explain. I did surprisingly well with that.

It was after the family event of my moms celebration of life that triggered me emotionally. It was the first time at a family event that neither my dad or mom was there with me and my brother. Combine that with the fact I went a full year after my moms passing without any family; it causes me to start crying again.

Every family event for the rest of my life will be without my parents with me. The next time I visit ST. Louis, where my parents are originally from, will be without them. It’s disorienting and painful to be at family events without my mom or dad.

Sadly I didn’t get the closure I wanted from my moms celebration of life memorial. It was far too short after being so alone for such a long period of time right after my moms passing.

I cry. I talk to my parents a lot especially over this past weekend and into the week so far.

I guess this is just something I have to process and work through now. Just like when my dad passed away almost 4 years ago and when my mom passed away a year ago I have to process this new string of emotions that has me wrought with sadness.

Man it hurts.

My moms passing isn’t going to consume my life and stop me from living, but, it hurts knowing I’ll never see her again.

Today, the first anniversary of her ascendance into heaven, we are finally having her celebration of life memorial day.

She passed from covid-19 like over 630,000 in the US alone, so far.

1 year ago today my mom reunited with my dad. She stopped suffering in the many ways she had been both physically and emotionally.

We could not get together until now because of covid transmission reality. It’s strange to not have a service shortly after the passing of a loved one. The closure is needed. Somehow I did find closure in keeping myself very busy throughout the year. You can see all the content I’ve shared on my website with my music creations, videos, writings, lots of overall creativity and massive amounts of content that will be available forever on my website and youtube channel. You can find those links in my bio area.

To go from watching my mom take her last breath to returning right back to life as if nothing happened is the most disorienting thing I’ve ever experienced. No funeral, no services of any kind, no get togethers with family etc.. This is the first I’ve seen any family, other than my brother who lives here in town, since before the pandemic.

Yesterday my family came into town from long distances. We all got together for dinner. Seeing any family at all for the first time since my mothers passing, since before the pandemic, was much needed. It’s hard to believe in the wake of losing someone close to me to death I had zero family experiences for a full year. It’s difficult to imagine that. But, I lived it.

Later today is my moms memorial celebration of life. It starts at the cemetery then on to the funeral home. The focus is celebration, visiting, supporting, being there for each other after long isolation, sharing stories, and honoring my moms life. There will be very little formalities. My mom would want everyone to be happy and to be here for each other; the living.

I miss you mom. I pause and cry from time to time. I miss you and dad more than anything I could ever possibly miss in this world. It hurts but I know I will see you again. I’m tearing up as I type this, but this is wonderful therapy for me because it’s for me and anyone else who reads this.

Tom

It gives you something to respond to so you can propel forward.

If you’re poor, change your response to a system that has robbed you and you can become wealthy.

When I was poor I blamed my boss for off shoring my job to India. My boss was responsible for offshoring my job to India but by boss was not responsible for the fact I suddenly had no livelihood.

Up to that point I had done nothing to start building my own residual income. That was on me, not my bovine former boss.

Some of you won’t change the language you tell yourself til after you’re successful, then you’ll change.

That’s like a farmer saying, “I’ll sew seed after I have a harvest”.

How dumb is that?

Change the language in your head first then you can be successful.

The farmer has to sew seed first before a harvest is possible.

You’re not poor because you’ve been robbed by a society that’s made it perfectly legal to perpetually steal from you. You’re poor because your response to legalized theft has kept you poor.

It begins with changing the language you tell yourself.

When I stopped blaming my sudden loss of income I became powerful over my own destiny in that instant because it opened my mind to a rich and creative mind on the hunt for solutions to my problems.

You might be a busy hard working ethical individual but you’ve been lazy in re-programming your mind from an excuse making one into a rich and creative mind on the hunt for solutions.

In a strange twist of irony the hardest working people are often the laziest people with one excuse after another; preventing them from solving problems; keeping themselves poor.

It’s nothing to demonize, but, if this realization gives someone a swift kick in the mental be-hind to shift into a rich and creative solution oriented mind then that’s pretty awesome.

If you’re takeaway from this is to be offended then you’re proving my point with laziness no matter how hard working you are.

Draw a line in the sand and jump over with both feet.

Recognize your power is a sleeping giant waiting to be awakened.

That sleeping giant you can wake up simply by changing the language you tell yourself.

It’s not about what’s happened to you.

It’s about how you respond to what happens to you that determines if you’re just another turd in the herd of obedient workers perpetually being stolen from or if you’re going to finally propel forward.

You can do it <3

I created Change Makers for solution oriented people who want to live a healthy chemical free life and make better money.

Tom

P.s. If you’d like to work with me I don’t charge any fees I’m not going to sell you something you don’t want or need: http://workwithtom.fireyourboss.xyz

Have you enjoyed this? Was it helpful in breaking some circular thought patterns you might have been stuck in? Do you know anyone who could benefit from this? Sharing is caring. Share with friends and family.

Was this helpful? If so, I would greatly appreciate it if you commented and shared on Facebook and other Social Media, too. You might also enjoy Fire Your Boss & 31 Ways to Raise Money Now.

 

If you enjoyed my blog you might LOVE my YouTube video about changing one thing, the direction of your cash-flow, to change Everything:

 

The harder Americans work the poorer they become.

Poverty is a habit.

Inheriting a fortune is not a habit.

Building wealth is a habit.

A small segment of heirs to a fortune are robbing poor people blind.

They inherit a fortune they did not create to take a small percentage of to legally bribe our elected politicians to rob the poor and the middle through our public treasury.

If you’re waiting for those external forces to do the right thing so that you can be better off then you are screwing yourself over with their help.

You have no power over them and the circumstances they’ve created for you.

When you place your energy where your power is, that is, how you respond to everything, you begin to take control of your destiny.

Be curious and eager to get out of your own head and learn something new outside of what you already know.

Be consistent about what you learn.

Now your potential has shifted from limited to unlimited.

Tom

P.s. If you’d like to work with me I don’t charge any fees I’m not going to sell you something you don’t want or need: http://workwithtom.fireyourboss.xyz

Have you enjoyed this? Was it helpful in breaking some circular thought patterns you might have been stuck in? Do you know anyone who could benefit from this? Sharing is caring. Share with friends and family.

Was this helpful? If so, I would greatly appreciate it if you commented and shared on Facebook and other Social Media, too. You might also enjoy Fire Your Boss & 31 Ways to Raise Money Now.

If you enjoyed my blog you might LOVE my YouTube video about changing one thing, the direction of your cash-flow, to change Everything:

Have you taken advantage of opportunities a pandemic offers NOT at the expense of others or have you been taken advantage of?

Have you done anything to build residual income to protect you and your family or have you been pushed around by unfair circumstances?

Are you more healthy and financially free or are you less healthy and less financially free?

Are you taking action towards your dreams or are you procrastinating closer toward poverty?

Find out how most people responded to the pandemic, do the exact opposite, and you’ll be unusually successful.

Instead of changing your circumstances learn how to respond to your circumstances so you can arrive at a destination of your choosing.

Instead of taking offense over this post become inspired by this post to draw a line in the sand to jump over with BOTH feet.

Tom

P.s. If you’d like to work with me I don’t charge any fees I’m not going to sell you something you don’t want or need: http://workwithtom.fireyourboss.xyz

Have you enjoyed this? Was it helpful in breaking some circular thought patterns you might have been stuck in? Do you know anyone who could benefit from this? Sharing is caring. Share with friends and family.

Was this helpful? If so, I would greatly appreciate it if you commented and shared on Facebook and other Social Media, too. You might also enjoy Fire Your Boss & 31 Ways to Raise Money Now.

If you enjoyed my blog you might LOVE my YouTube video about changing one thing, the direction of your cash-flow, to change Everything:

As you GROW to create your wonderful life be prepared..

There will be people who feel your growth makes them look small.

Secretly there will be some people wishing you to fail so they feel comfortable playing small with their own lives.

They will smile in your face pretending to love you.

They will come around when their down and vanish when they’re back up again.

Some will hate how others love you and be disgusted at how some are influenced by you.

Some will be more honest and tell you to your face you are toxic positivity.

Some will support you, pretend support you, bash you to your face, bash you behind your back while loving you to your face; it will never end. Some will even try to get others to turn on you and some of them will be successful at getting others to hate you, too.

Are you ready for this or will it break you and cause you to shrink back into playing small so they are comfortable with you again?

You’re going to be stretched on both ends and it’s gonna be necessary to give you the emotional maturity and humility you will need to sustainably grow into who you desire to become.

Few will grow while most will only sit back on the sidelines to witness growth in the few.

Most will take their dreams to their grave while few will give their dreams life.

Embrace losing some people in your life for the net gain of growth in yourself and the new people you will connect with.

The question you have to ask yourself is this…

Are your dreams big enough to grow you or small enough to shrink you?

You’ll always be pulled by your dreams or pushed around like a rag doll flailing in the wind by your circumstances.

Tom

P.s. If you’d like to work with me I don’t charge any fees I’m not going to sell you something you don’t want or need: http://workwithtom.fireyourboss.xyz

Have you enjoyed this? Was it helpful in breaking some circular thought patterns you might have been stuck in? Do you know anyone who could benefit from this? Sharing is caring. Share with friends and family.

Was this helpful? If so, I would greatly appreciate it if you commented and shared on Facebook and other Social Media, too. You might also enjoy Fire Your Boss & 31 Ways to Raise Money Now.

If you enjoyed my blog you might LOVE my YouTube video about changing one thing, the direction of your cash-flow, to change Everything:

This philosophical refinement can change the course of the rest of your life as it did for me.

This video I’m going to use the example of money because money is easily measured because all of us know how to count money.

Poor people are not lazy, they have just messed up with money and we’ve all got multiple somethings we’ve messed up.

Rich people are not automatically hard workers they are divided up between hard workers and extremely lazy.

The segment of the rich who are lazy are lazy because they’ve inherited their Fortune then used a small percentage of it to legally bribe our politicians to Rob poor people of their money through the public treasury while they sit on their lazy butts. So let’s just recognize that sad, unfair, and morally bankrupt reality right off the bat.

This country desperately needs a public policy that does not allow companies to render their workers too poor to live.

We have no control over that set of circumstances so instead let us focus our energy where our power actually is, that is, how we respond to our countries morally bankrupt unfair public policy.

Earlier I said poor people are not lazy they just messed up with money. It’s either a budgeting problem, an earnings problem, or a combination of both budgeting and earnings.

It’s not judging or demonizing to point out and recognize mistakes. We all make mistakes it’s part of Being Human. Unfortunately many of us don’t recognize our mistakes therefore we trap ourselves and that is an inside job.

The solution is also an inside job.

If you’re broke struggling to make ends meet you have to recognize you’ve messed up with money and love yourself unconditionally because this is about finding Solutions not self-loathing or demonizing.

Do you make plenty of money, a little money, no money, but you have a spending problem? If so, is it worthwhile for you to figure out how to earn more money so you can fund how the lifestyle you love?

In my opinion it’s better to grow your bank account to fund your dreams rather than shrink your dreams to to match your income.

Mainstream advice will tell you to shrink your dreams and live below your means.

There are two problems with this. One, it will kill your human spirit and two, that shuts off your brain from a rich and creative process to solve problems; making it easier to become mentally lazy and find excuses.

If you commit yourself to Growing your income you begin to unleash the power of your human brain to search and find solutions to earning more money to fund your dreams.

Typically if you listen to what most people are telling you and run the opposite direction you will be unusually successful, remember that.

The next time someone tells you to shrink your dreams and live below your means, be polite but use that as fuel to motivate the living daylights out of yourself to prove them wrong.

Don’t live below your means, expand your means and live the best one and only life you’re ever going to get. Unleash the power of your mind to a rich and creative problem solving one and you can grow your means to fund your dreams.

Doesn’t that sound like more fun than shrinking your dreams to match your stagnate income?

I thought so.

You’re probably not going to be able to change circumstances you cannot control so place your energy where your power is, that is, refining your personal philosophy to how you respond to your circumstances as stepping stones forward.

For me that meant getting into a side health and fitness gig that pays me residual money which made my job optional. Residual money made my job optional.

Residual money.

Learn residual money.

Make your job optional and open up your own options in life.

Tom

P.s. If you’d like to work with me I don’t charge any fees I’m not going to sell you something you don’t want or need: http://workwithtom.fireyourboss.xyz

Have you enjoyed this? Was it helpful in breaking some circular thought patterns you might have been stuck in? Do you know anyone who could benefit from this? Sharing is caring. Share with friends and family.

Was this helpful? If so, I would greatly appreciate it if you commented and shared on Facebook and other Social Media, too. You might also enjoy Fire Your Boss & 31 Ways to Raise Money Now.

If you enjoyed my blog you might LOVE my YouTube video about changing one thing, the direction of your cash-flow, to change Everything:

Waiting around is how you get left behind.

Poor people are not lazy and rich people are not automatically hard workers.

Procrastination is the cornerstone of all poverties not just financial poverty.

Hard workers without personal philosophy refinement can work multiple jobs and still struggle to make ends meet.

Work hard refining your personal philosophies and you can multiply your income while working less not more; giving you more options in life.

A fragment at the top is robbing busy workers blind.

Busy workers are surrounded by people telling them there is nothing they can do because of circumstances they cannot control.

That advice is death, reject it one billion percent.

Your power is not on what you cannot control.

Your power is on how you respond to what you cannot control.

Follow through with correction and re-correction in perpetuity; there will be no stopping you.

Now you’re at the very beginning of unleashing the power of your mind to a rich and creative one from a poor and lazy one.

You’ve been working hard at your job but you’ve been lazy on refining your personal philosophies.

Bring your hard work ethic into a better personal philosophy and there will be no set of uncontrollable circumstances you cannot get ahead of.

When I was income-less, jobless, and out of unemployment benefits I was presented a residual income opportunity in a health and fitness.

The old me would have said, “I’m income-less, jobless, and I ran out of unemployment. I can’t afford this start up cost so I’m not going to do it”.

The new me said, “I’m income-less, jobless, and I ran out of unemployment. I can’t afford NOT to get started”.

This paradigm shift from an inferior personal philosophy to a better personal philosophy was the key to the very beginnings of unleashing my own power. It forced me to get creative so I could sign up and get started.

From that experience I came up with 31 ways to raise money without having any.

Since then I’ve published that on my website for anyone else to use.

If I stayed with the same mentally lazy philosophy that kept me back I would not have been creative enough to come up with so many ways of raising the money I needed to get started.

My job being off-shored was no fault of my own but it did not have to define my financial life anymore.

If you are co-dependent on your job to take care of you financially it’s because of your personal philosophy.

If you wish to, you can upgrade your philosophy and go on a beautiful transition to making your job optional, thereby drastically improving your options in life.

If something happens to your job at no fault of your own and you have no residual money to cover your living expenses it’s because you’ve failed to upgrade your personal philosophy to a better one.

Your job disappearing is no fault of your own but your decision not to do anything about it is an inside job. The solution is also an inside job. That’s where your power is, if you’ll unleash your power.

The same logic applies to your health, relationships, life, etc. Personal philosophy is not just for how you secure your livelihood.

When it comes to poverty there should be a two prong approach in my opinion. 1.) New public policy that does not allow companies to render their workers to poor to live and 2.) personal responsibility for you to work hard on refining your personal philosophy.

Public policy you have no control over. Personal responsibility on refining your personal philosophy you have 100% control over. Put your energy where your power is if you want better options in life.

The next time someone tells you there is nothing you can do because of circumstances, use that as fuel for your own motivation, and go out there to prove them wrong.

Live a healthy chemical free life, make your job optional, support and love each other, and LIVE free.

Tom

P.s. If you’d like to work with me I don’t charge any fees I’m not going to sell you something you don’t want or need: http://workwithtom.fireyourboss.xyz

Have you enjoyed this? Was it helpful in breaking some circular thought patterns you might have been stuck in? Do you know anyone who could benefit from this? Sharing is caring. Share with friends and family.

Was this helpful? If so, I would greatly appreciate it if you commented and shared on Facebook and other Social Media, too. You might also enjoy Fire Your Boss & 31 Ways to Raise Money Now.

If you enjoyed my blog you might LOVE my YouTube video about changing one thing, the direction of your cash-flow, to change Everything:

Real passive income opportunities. They are out there! I’ve taken advantage of some of them and I’m going to share with you some of them that I have and have not experienced myself. Passive income is money that pays you regardless of how you spend your time, essentially decoupling your income away from your time so you can spend your time doing what you want and be covered financially. My end goal with this video is for you to walk away after watching this video to its completion with some new ideas on how you can see yourself creating your first stream of passive income, or if you’ve already got some passive income, then my goal is for you to gain some new ideas on how you can create more passive income. So let’s get started!

By the way if you are excited about the topic of this video please tickle that gorgeous like button until it turns blue, subscribe, hit the bell, and in the comments let me know if you already do or do not have any passive income. This will actually help me out a lot with the algorithms here, and I want to keep creating content that you find helpful.

A real passive income opportunity requires some up front work before it can even have the potential to pay you for the rest of your life. This is where most people will lose interest because let’s face it, we are culturally conditioned to automatically get paid based on the time we’ve put into our work. Show up get paid. Show up get paid. Show up get paid. The proverbial hamster you’ll never get ahead. You’ll never have freedom of your time this way. It takes time to undo a life time of bad conditioning. But if you’re willing to undo that bad conditioning in your mind you can re train your brain to show up and don’t get paid. Show up and still don’t get paid. Show up get paid. Don’t show up, still get paid. Wow what happened? Passive money is starting to kick in. It’s slow at first but keep showing up! Commit to that up front investment of your time to keep building up your passive income to the point of it covering ALL of your expenses both necessity and luxury. Maybe at that point you can pull back half throttle. Maybe take a couple weeks off to travel and vacation and watch how you’re still getting paid even while vacationing and rejuvenating.

Now that you are prepped and well aware that this takes consistent action over a period of time upfront before you’re likely to see a dime of passive income, you are ready to get started on your journey of attaining time freedom that only passive income can give you.

You could buy a traditional business like a microsoft or an amazon that’s already set up, has established business, and is for sale provided you have millions or billions of dollars to make the purchase. Obviously this is something only available to a very small percentile of the population so this is not going to work as a starting place for almost all of us so I won’t spend any more time on that in this video, except to say there is no reason you can’t start where you’re at no matter what and build from there to the point of having the option of purchasing a business that already has the positive passive cash-flow built in for you. When you do build and build and you get to that point where you can buy an established profitable business, if you want to keep the income passive, hire managers to run the business for you. You can have the vision for what you want to business to be and hire managers to carry out and execute that vision for you.

So moving right along..

Royalty checks! That’s passive income. For this you’d have to be super famous like michael jordan, madonna, an ex president, everybody knows your name and already spends money on through other merchandise and things like that. You could write a book and give distribution rights to various entities who would agree to give you a certain cut per each book that is sold. Effectively others would be selling your book for you and just sending you royalty checks making this a passive form of income. Since this is not available for the overwhelming majority of the population let’s move on, but still, let this idea of royalties soak into your brain because as you build your passive income up from zero to however big you’d like, you will gain new options that may not be available yet to you right now.

Real estate! specifically investor and owner of rental properties. Now this is one that I personally got into! I was spring boarded into being able to do real estate from another passive income opportunity that I will get into next. Real estate is available to far more people that royalties or big business purchase, but still not available for a large plurality of the country who lives paycheck to paycheck as it is. Depending on that area of the country you live in a down payment just to get your foot in the door on your first property could range anywhere from twenty thousand dollars to a million dollars. Let’s pick a realistic average just for this example, say fifty thousand dollar down payment on a property. The minimum down payment on a non owner occupied property is twenty five percent, with seventy five percent being financed. A two hundred thousand dollar purchase price would require a fifty thousand dollar down payment. The property is going to come with operational costs as well as mortgage principal and interest. You also have property taxes, insurance, maintenance, cleaning, repairs, it’s a huge expense to own a rental property. Your net profit or loss after property income minus expenses is going to roughly one hundred fifty to two hundred dollars per month of income on a fifty thousand dollar down payment. Just to get your foot in the door with a fifty thousand dollar down payment is going to give you a return of one hundred and fifty to two hundred dollars per month! You need to keep buying rental properties to keep increasing your passive income . For most people this would take so many years to do that it wouldn’t be worth it because you’d probably have passed on from old age before you became financially free with your new found time freedom anyway. All you have to do to make rental property income passive is hire a great property manager. I hired a management company. They are AWESOME! I’ve never met any of my tenants, my management company literally does everything for me so I have all my time to myself to do other things.

Youtube creator! This is certainly available to everyone because it does not cost any money. But, where it’s free financially, it’s most likely going to have to be made up for by taking you more time to do with more consistency. But it’s worth it! This is another passive income stream I am enjoying and is a recent development for me. I just love getting passive money from something that I really love doing. For a while I did not even know youtube was paying me because I was creating all these videos out of an innate joy I have for creating them. To make passive money with youtube first you have to create a google adsense account, reach a thousand subscribers, and have a minimum total of four thousand view time hours across your whole channel. Once you’ve met this criteria, you are eligible to start monetizing your videos.

Network Marketing! This is another passive income opportunity I have experience in and this is actually my first passive income opportunity. Staying true to form of passive income a network marketing business takes an upfront investment of time, and unlike being a youtube creator this does take a very tiny upfront financial investment. The cost is so minimal most if not all people can do this one. First you’d want to find a good product and a good company that you can get behind and support. From there it’s just a matter of a small financial investment and a true love for learning something new. Unlike traditional business, network marketing is far less of a financial investment with an enormous upside potential. Best risk to reward ratio is a hallmark of a good network marketing opportunity. Because network marketing offers both passive and residual money simultaneously, you have the potential of explosive growth here. Once you’ve embraced learning and doing something new on a daily bases to build your network marketing business you will emerge at some future point with passive and residual money from your new network marketing business.

Once I get my network marketing business going and I started making really nice money I saved every penny of it that I could and eventually used that first passive income stream to buy another passive income stream, that is, my first rental property! And my second one.. And third.. And so on! The network marketing gig was the key ingredient to making it all work. For me here is how this all relates to each other. It’s important you begin to visualize how this could positively affect you. First I got the network marketing business going because I couldn’t afford anything else at the time so I got started where I was at with my life and decided early on that I would keep building and growing as a person to be able to do all this stuff. Once I began doing well financially in the first business I decided I would put as much of that network marketing income toward my new rental property business. Now I have two passive income streams, one feeding the other, and eventually a third I will talk about now. My youtube videos don’t cost any money unless you don’t already have a good camera and a tripod then you’d need to invest in a good camera and tripod. It does take a lot of time to get it going. If you don’t have freedom of time it’s going to make it take so much longer! My first two passive income streams give me freedom of time. The network marketing business by itself gave me freedom of time so I just use as much of that money as I can, after affording all my living and luxury expenses, to effectively buy more passive income with my rental property business. So after I earned my freedom of time I started taking youtube very seriously and dedicating my free time toward that. Through lots of embracing the new learning of how to be a great youtube creator I create youtube videos that hopefully people will want to watch. When I put a new youtube video on my channel, and if it does well, that one video will continue to pay me passive money for a long time into the future. Each youtube video that I put onto my channel has the POSSIBILITY of doing well and continuously paying me long after I created that particular video only once. The more successful youtube videos I put onto my channel the more I add to my passive income from youtube. It might take me a lot of videos til I create that once and a while video that does exceptionally well, but each time I create a new video that does exceptionally well it’s just one effort that pays me potentially for the rest of my life even if I never make another youtube video again. I will keep making more youtube videos about matters I love talking about anyway, and once and a while I will have a great performing video that adds to my passive income.

So from my example I hope you can see how everything relates to everything. I hope you made the note about how I got started with little money in the first passive income stream and built my way up step by step from there. Truth be told I actually started with ZERO money. I put that initial investment on my credit card then got myself to work immediately so I’d be able to pay off that small credit card charge next month. I never missed a credit card payment! I hope more than anything you’ve got some ideas on how you can get started from where ever your starting point is. Getting started so you can have that initial experience is going to be so valuable for you in terms of the feedback that only experience can provide for you. Visualize how after you get your first passive income stream going, how you can use that to spring board you into another passive income opportunity spring boarded by the first one, and keep building step by step from their.

I hope you enjoyed this video and if you did please ravage that ravishing like button, subscribe, and hit the bell because that helps me out. Also I would love to know if you already do or do not have any passive income in the comments section!

I will leave links to helpful resources in the description area of this video.

Take care, I will be creating my next video very, very soon for you.

-Tom

P.s. If you’d like to work with me I don’t charge any fees I’m not going to sell you something you don’t want or need: http://workwithtom.fireyourboss.xyz

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